|
It is currently Mon May 13, 2024 3:11 am
|
Pokemon Movile the curse of Kadabra!
Author |
Message |
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
Well.. i just like legends and things about battles and stuff...thats why i think it cool..now continue it... i like those battle things too much..i still wanna hear the end..and.. as you said..it does rock because of the fighting..
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 12:08 am |
|
|
Nido
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2004 3:52 am Posts: 625 Location: Israel!
|
I was so blown away at the incredible writing skills that shine in this story, that I had to share it with some friends. But, they were rather skeptical. They said that "it's too short", and that "it seems like it was improvised on the spot", and that "it lacks correct literature and English rules", but I shot them down, telling them that apparently they don't know how to appreciate good art. Then again, these were the same people who told me that Michaelangelo's painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel is just some sloppy graffiti. So, there goes their credibility down the drain. Anyways, I explained to them all of the metaphors, and clever literature skills ever so prominent in this story, "Lugia and the catastrophy". I explained that these things are so complex, it obviously took much careful planning to get it to come out just right. And the planning was obviously successful, because this is one of the most intense, nail-bitingly exciting stories I've ever had the divine pleasure of reading. I'm really right on the edge of my seat. Whoops, there, I just fell off it. Can't wait for more!
_________________ <center><img src="http://neuto.piccontinuum.com/Neuto/Nido.jpg"></center> <center><img src="http://www.psypokes.com/forums/images/trainercards/Nido.png"> <img src="http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b144/ChroniclerC/SolarCards/Nido.png"></center>
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:22 am |
|
|
Lintaro
Gym Leader
Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2005 1:45 pm Posts: 331
|
This is another chapter
As the mountains broke,meanwhile lugia frozen in the deep death discovered power,not any kind of power but shadow power!
Lugia would do anything to stop absol,so he took the power and..................................kraaaaaaaaaaawk!!!!
Lugia had transformed into non else but Shadow Lugia!
He had amazing darkness powers but instead the powers control lugia not lugia itself.
Latias and Latios failed their mission to protect the city from the catastrophic absol,but then when they discoverd shadow Lugia...........Lugia used Dark Hyper Beam!
Knocking Latias and Latios out!
Now the shadow pokemon must fight!
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:20 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
awsome!!now continue it..i wanna hear the end!hey...why dont u make the next chapter longer..so we dont have to wait and wait for another chapter to just read a little about the story.well this is the first time ive heard something cool..mostly i see the tittle is cool but the story is dam dumb.but urs..is the opposite which i like the title sucks about the castrophy is sucky name but the story dam rocks! happy happy
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:23 pm |
|
|
Nido
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2004 3:52 am Posts: 625 Location: Israel!
|
Wow! Lintaro, you've done it again. What original ideas! Lugia being frozen in the deep death, who would have ever been able to think of that besides you?! The drama! The action! The suspense! I can't wait for more!
_________________ <center><img src="http://neuto.piccontinuum.com/Neuto/Nido.jpg"></center> <center><img src="http://www.psypokes.com/forums/images/trainercards/Nido.png"> <img src="http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b144/ChroniclerC/SolarCards/Nido.png"></center>
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:41 pm |
|
|
Gangsta_Vi3t
Bug Catcher
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2005 5:38 pm Posts: 2
|
woah. that is just so awesome.
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:49 pm |
|
|
ChroniclerC
Ace Trainer
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 12:17 pm Posts: 423
|
It just keeps getting better and better!! I've never heard such an exqusite story! I can't wait for the next chapter!
_________________ <img src="images/trainercards/chroniclerc.png"> <img src="http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b144/ChroniclerC/SolarCards/ChroniclerC.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:51 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 2:52 pm |
|
|
dragonfan149
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Tue Dec 28, 2004 1:30 pm Posts: 806 Location: PDX
|
I showed it to some of my friends and they loved it. The action is well scripted, I can see it so clearly in my mind. No wonder your story is at the top of the list of topics, it's great.
_________________ SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH THE CD!
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!
DUST!
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:05 pm |
|
|
black_flygon
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2005 5:20 pm Posts: 590 Location: meh...xico
|
I don't find a way to not be happy here golden, they're marvelous, thou they're not as marvelous as before the vacatins!
anyway, i don't see much plot in the story, grammar is good, dialogues (even if they're minimum) you should use the people actually talking, not reported speech. I still say that i don't find good plot in it and i can't find a reasonable answer why people say its good...chapters are short, and it sounds like one of those peter pan stories (no offense to PP fans)...you should imprve it...
(i don't mean to be rude or anything, these ARE supporting critics)
I'd give in total you a 6/10...
_________________Click me! Tall grass txtrpg!
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:07 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
black_flygon wrote: I don't find a way to not be happy here golden, they're marvelous, thou they're not as marvelous as before the vacatins!
anyway, i don't see much plot in the story, grammar is good, dialogues (even if they're minimum) you should use the people actually talking, not reported speech. I still say that i don't find good plot in it and i can't find a reasonable answer why people say its good...chapters are short, and it sounds like one of those peter pan stories (no offense to PP fans)...you should imprve it...
(i don't mean to be rude or anything, these ARE supporting critics)
I'd give in total you a 6/10...
is that too low..cause this is a awsome story..id give 9.9/10 !!woohoo!!this is awsome..but black flygon..ur giving him a too low score for somthing thats so good and even Amphy likes!the mods and the administrators like it!that means everyone famous on the forums think it rocks!so i think you should give it a higher score dude!!woohoo!!
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:09 pm |
|
|
ChroniclerC
Ace Trainer
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 12:17 pm Posts: 423
|
black_flygon wrote: I don't find a way to not be happy here golden, they're marvelous, thou they're not as marvelous as before the vacatins!
anyway, i don't see much plot in the story, grammar is good, dialogues (even if they're minimum) you should use the people actually talking, not reported speech. I still say that i don't find good plot in it and i can't find a reasonable answer why people say its good...chapters are short, and it sounds like one of those peter pan stories (no offense to PP fans)...you should imprve it...
(i don't mean to be rude or anything, these ARE supporting critics)
I'd give in total you a 6/10...
Man, what are you, daft? This is the best story EVER!!! I give it a 36/10! It's just that good!
_________________ <img src="images/trainercards/chroniclerc.png"> <img src="http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b144/ChroniclerC/SolarCards/ChroniclerC.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:15 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
ChroniclerC wrote: black_flygon wrote: I don't find a way to not be happy here golden, they're marvelous, thou they're not as marvelous as before the vacatins!
anyway, i don't see much plot in the story, grammar is good, dialogues (even if they're minimum) you should use the people actually talking, not reported speech. I still say that i don't find good plot in it and i can't find a reasonable answer why people say its good...chapters are short, and it sounds like one of those peter pan stories (no offense to PP fans)...you should imprve it...
(i don't mean to be rude or anything, these ARE supporting critics)
I'd give in total you a 6/10...
Man, what are you, daft? This is the best story EVER!!! I give it a 36/10! It's just that good! dont be mean to my kind buddy black flygon...but i do agree it should be pretty high score.
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:18 pm |
|
|
black_flygon
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2005 5:20 pm Posts: 590 Location: meh...xico
|
Goldenprince wrote: black_flygon wrote: I don't find a way to not be happy here golden, they're marvelous, thou they're not as marvelous as before the vacatins!
anyway, i don't see much plot in the story, grammar is good, dialogues (even if they're minimum) you should use the people actually talking, not reported speech. I still say that i don't find good plot in it and i can't find a reasonable answer why people say its good...chapters are short, and it sounds like one of those peter pan stories (no offense to PP fans)...you should imprve it...
(i don't mean to be rude or anything, these ARE supporting critics)
I'd give in total you a 6/10... i think you should give it a higher score dude!!woohoo!!
please don't think for others, ive got my own mind
Goldenprince wrote: dont be mean to my kind buddy black flygon...but i do agree it should be pretty high score.
thank you!
anyway people, a group of people (counting me) are official raters, we ARE supposed to make critics and 'try' to help with our critics, i gavemy own reasons and i have decided my score, and im not willing to change it unless there is a change here....
_________________Click me! Tall grass txtrpg!
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 3:34 pm |
|
|
Torkoal power
Dragon Tamer
Joined: Wed Jun 29, 2005 2:37 pm Posts: 216 Location: God knows where i am.
|
i cannot wait to here the next part, its very good. If i were to rated it i would rate it 20/10.
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:34 pm |
|
|
Lintaro
Gym Leader
Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2005 1:45 pm Posts: 331
|
Next part well here it is!
Since the shadow pokemon was ready to fight a man called Dublin saw shadow lugia and want to capture him!
Absol was creating chaos like crazy,the city was suffering tornadoes,storms blizzards,spores!
As shadow Lugia aproched absol,absol noticed that the Lugia is more powerful than before and -------Absol got hit by a Shadow Hyper Beam!
Kraaaaaawkkkk,said lugia as absol fell to the ground.
Lugia couldnt even control itself at that moment so he made a shadow tornado!
Absol kept fighting throwing razor winds at Shadow Lugia,then Dublin's army got to the fight and tried to capture Shadow Lugia!-to be continued-
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:44 pm |
|
|
Sneaky Sneasel
Gym Leader
Joined: Sat Feb 12, 2005 5:21 pm Posts: 3128 Location: College
|
Can this story get any better? Only one way to find out. Keep up the good work Lintaro.
This is THE only reason I come to Psypoke now.
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:47 pm |
|
|
Darkkend
Lite Four
Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2004 9:44 am Posts: 655 Location: Los Angeles, CA
|
OMG I can see your talent ooze into your writings. The way you describe the action feels like im right there hiding behind a bush. I would like to make this thread a sticky but i dont want to show specail treatment in the fan fiction section.
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:51 pm |
|
|
dragonfan149
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Tue Dec 28, 2004 1:30 pm Posts: 806 Location: PDX
|
There's mystery to! Who's this Dublin guy anyway? Can't wait for the next chapter.
_________________ SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH THE CD!
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!
DUST!
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 5:00 pm |
|
|
Benjamin
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Sat Dec 18, 2004 7:10 pm Posts: 740 Location: Houston, TX
|
I worship you. Even though I've gotten straight A's in my english classes, I can never even come close to your skills.
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 7:37 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
ok...nice..but the other chapters were better..but this is still a nice chapter
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Mon Jul 04, 2005 7:45 pm |
|
|
Lintaro
Gym Leader
Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2005 1:45 pm Posts: 331
|
|
Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:44 pm |
|
|
Goldenprince
Ace Trainer
Joined: Sun Jun 26, 2005 6:03 pm Posts: 320 Location: NOTHING
|
_________________<img src="images/trainercards/Goldenprince.png">
|
Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:48 pm |
|
|
Seraphim Riku
Ace Trainer
Joined: Wed Jun 29, 2005 10:58 am Posts: 379 Location: Loading... Connection cannot be found. Please refresh the page.
|
This is pretty good actually. Sounds like its a fusion of PKMN Heroes, Gale of Darkness, and Jirachi Wishmaker (the dragons).
_________________<center> ~Custom Meowth, TR Revamp Made by me~</center>
|
Tue Jul 05, 2005 5:48 pm |
|
|
Nido
Pokemon Ranger
Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2004 3:52 am Posts: 625 Location: Israel!
|
Wow, Lintaro, that last chapter just totally drives the others into the ground. It's like the best thing I've ever read... EVER. And that's saying something, since I read quite a lot of classic literature. But you're better than Shakespeare, even.
_________________ <center><img src="http://neuto.piccontinuum.com/Neuto/Nido.jpg"></center> <center><img src="http://www.psypokes.com/forums/images/trainercards/Nido.png"> <img src="http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b144/ChroniclerC/SolarCards/Nido.png"></center>
|
Tue Jul 05, 2005 5:56 pm |
|
|
|
Who is online |
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 21 guests |
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot post attachments in this forum
|
|