I didn''t read through everything, but the 2nd-person view is pretty original. At first I felt a little... controlled and like it was bad, but I got used to it. IIt's a pretty ridiculous plot, but it's fun too.

EDIT: I read it. Most of my comments from before apply, but I must say that your method of posting is very unorthodox and unprofessional. You should type these in a word processor like Word and look over it before posting, not jiust hit the 'reply' button and type stuff. Your writing could be so much better...

I love mudkips! (notice the name) I till think your story is great and keep going, don't worry, I got a negative comment from that guy too, your story is fine and keep going, a lot of ppl love it

>_> Sorry for bringing in a slightly more professional opinion in here. If we wants to have something that's professional, he'd best follow my advise.

That is sooooo funny! Keep up the good work!

Banov: No I don't want something professional: it's better that way IMO.

Part 12!!!! >: D

You snap open to a high pitched cry. Using your super-sensitive changable radar fin, you sense that it came from inside Victory Road. You decide to go.

In front of the entrance, you hear eerie sounds. There is a sign that says Victory Road, but in small letters at the bottom it says, "Very Few Victors Emerge." Shivering in fear, you trudge in.

* * *

You find the source of the high-pitched screech: a gazillion golbats and zubats! You try to walk silently, trying not to catch the bats' attention, and almost make it, when...

FFFT!!!!

A gassy fart propels you and you hit headfirst into a Golbat.

The golbat immediately spots you and, at breakneck speed, charges and bites you, withdraws what feels like 6 oz. of blood , and breaks his neck in the end.

You feel very feeble. Your eyesight is blurred, your hearing is distorted, all your saliva has been blended with blood, your steps are taking a lot of energy, and your skin is slowing turning a deepening shade of purple.

You feel a sense of doom, that this could go no worse, when suddenly, you blorch a drop of saliva-blood. The splash echoes through all of Victory Road, sounding like it's been amplified a 1000 times. You immediately feel even more doomed... as all 31 415 926 535 897 932 384 626 433 832 795 zubats and golbats spot you leaking fresh, lucious blood. You see a swarm of moving purple. Your vision starts to darken as you begin to black out from the bats' screeches and the drop's echo. You have now lost too much blood to walk, but still enough to think.

Quickly, you calculate how much time you have left before certain doom. 10 seconds... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...

Just when it was half a second before certain doom, you see a swoop of 3 colours: red, blue and white. You instantly know what are the UFO you've been riding on for 2 seconds and the UFO that's been flying on are: latios and latias!

Travelling at supersonic speeds, you ferry on latias while latios trys to lessen the attackers. Unfortunately, each time he makes a zubat or golbat with a thunderbolt, ice beam or psychic, 100 more take its' place.

Seeing as that he needed to take drastic action, he damages himself and his counterpart, slamming into latias to make her go faster, also known as the move Double-Edge.

Slipping gracefully and stealthfully, you and the 2 counterparts slip through the dark dungeons, now with 31 415 926 535 897 932 384 626 433 832 792 bats following you. Suddenly, you see a strange creature that looks like this . You recognize it as you've played this game on the Game Boy Player on the Game Cube at Brendan's house a loooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggg time ago, and know of it's devastating power. Without warning, you grab it, stuff it into your mouth, and swallow although it tastes horribly bitter, you feel surges of power coming up. You tell latias to heal your wounds. As she does so, you tell her that after she and her counterpart should flee, because your next might be making their flying their last.

Jumping onto a stone pillar,you turn and face the bats. You focus the energy in your hands. You look up in the skies... and release the energy surges!!!!!

A huge blue lightningbolt strikes onto you. Strangely, it does damage you, but is forming a huge charge-up of energy. You absorb more energy. The bats go closer. You absorb more enrgy! The bats prepare to bite! You take in so much energy that you are almost crushed by it's pressures. The bats are an inch away from your skin. And just when the bats are about to take their withdrawl of blood, BOOM.

A sphere of yellow energy forms around you. Then at light speed... it explodes!!!!!

The powerful sphere of energy is destroying and disintegrating everything it's touching, including the other pok

IT IS A REALLY COOL STORY...
I THINK I WILL WRITE A STORY ABOUT JIRACHI...
BUT DON'T WORRY IT WON'T BE LIKE YOURS!!!!

yay! Mudkip goes through a dungeon! Huzzah! Mudki pwill kick rear end in there, I know it, wait, he will, right?

I agree with elite42 on this one, this story is a lot more fun to read in a non-professional manner.

This story is very good because a lot of these kinda sill/funny stories don't go far, but this one really kicked off, and for good reason, keep it coming elite42!

part 13

You keep digging, your sensitive fin detecting a certain object. You keep diggin when OOOF! You bump into what looks like a stone neck.

You back away, only to bump into a steel neck. Surprised, you stumble backwards onto a suspicious switch that looks like this:


Suddenly, the ground shakes, as the 2 Pok

that little bit about knocking out the gym leader and taking his badge made me crack up, I really like this story

Hillarious!!! This is a great story! MUDKIPS ARE AWSOME!!

Mudkip is the funniest, but I believe it is Sotopolis gym...Pacifidlog doesn't have a gym.

Oh, yeah, you're right, it is supposed t obe Sootopolis.........Oh well, really cool story and keep submitting chapters!

I read up to part 11, and I just couldent read anymore. If I read more I'll die laughing! 10/10

PART 14
Note: You're right I accidentally typed Pacifidolg instead of Sootopolis. Oops!!

You decided to swim to Mossdeep to meet Steven, the past Pok

woot this story get 100/10 no that is not A typo I mean it if you ever find a end to this one you should start the adventures of torchic or treecko

any wy it's sweetly awsomely sweet and ect

the ending of the last chapter seemed a little cut-off, but besides that, this story is one of the most fun ones out there!

Mudkipman: Well, I didn't exactly finish... but ah well, i'll continue from there as the new chapter.

PART 15!!!!

...fell back from the force of your previous hit!!

Because Metagross weighs 1215 lbs., and because the floor of Steven's house was wooden... Metagross makes a giantic [s]hole[/s] crater in the ground. You decide to look into the pit. The Metagross is stuck in there. Arms under super heavy body, it is succesfully wedged in the bottom of the tight hole.

Steven gets very fed up with you beating his Metagross. He sends out his super-fast Skarmory. Skarmory flies around everywhere at sound-barrier-breaking speed, constantly shooting stars (the move Swift) and hitting you. It's time to turn on your dodging skills.

Most think it impossible to dodge Swift (in the real game, yes), but with super quick reflexes, well Skarmory was surprised. It shot stars at you but, MATRIX, you move just as the stars whiz under your arm at hit the floor. Skarmory tries again but MATRIX he misses again. He frantically starts shooting everywhere you can dodge and at you but, using the powers of MATRIX, you copy Neo Anderson's super move, and stop all the shuriken-like stars, and they fall down, harmless as a hair.

Skarmory flies on, aghast. With undeterminable speed, you jump at the Skarmory at beat it up.

Blow after blow, Skarmory reels in pain. After 5 minutes of pounding, all of the knive-like feathers fall off, leaving Skarmory as a featherless bird. Knowing that you were not one to mess with, it fled quickly.

Steven's temper was practically blowing off the top. He sent out his last 3 Pok

hahahahaha it soooo funny lololol i can't stop lol hahahaha 110/10 now keep up the sweet work hahahaha ok wooot mudkips rule and i want steven to die

LOL this is so funny i love every chapter keep it up i want more LOL
11/10

NOTE: as a request from ninetales fire, steven dies. Also, I accidentally wrote that claydol used giga drain instead of cradily.

PART 16

*shoot!!!!! gtg!!!!!! pretty sad, eh?
*k i'm back
_____________________________________________________________

Warning: Please do not feel offended if you're a Cradily lover.

Aggron frantically tried slashing you again, but you easily dodged them. Armaldo tried slashing you too. He was fast, but went this way and that dodgin every move... until you ended up in the gap of the Cradily. Seeing you as a easy target, it giga drains your liquids once again. Your vision slowly blurs, but you do a never done feat: YOU STICK YOUR HANDS IN CRADILY'S STRANGE HEAD'S MOUTH AND PULL OUT THE REAL HEAD FROM WITHIN!!!!!!!

One sight at the gruesome thing from within, and everything dropped down cold.

Steven unfortunately fell down on Metagross's hard body, and shattered his head into a gazillion pieces.

You decide to run away, and try not to attract too much attention among the Mossdeep citizens. You decide to go to the Mossdeep Space Center.

You quickly run up the stairs and talk to the scientist looking out the window. He says it's succesful flight ... No. 99!!!! Suddenly, he mutates into a weird monster with tentacles and grabs you. You slip out and end up slipping out the window onto the rocket!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You stow in under the living-room like compartment and shoot a bit of water out to breathe in.

Finally the rocket lands. The astronauts go to the livin quarters to find that the whole floor was filled with water!!!! You quickly find out that you have been discovered, and taking a spare space suit, you drench it in the water until it shrinks into your size. Then you flee from the rocket.

You see the floor is greyish. This must be the moon! you think as you trek around. You decide to ride on a nearby explorer and add some new data into the HD.

First you walk in front of the explorer, making it photograph your poses about a bajillion times. Then you decide to turn on it's sound system. You make the sound of water to fool the scientists.

After getting bored of adding all this "important" info, you decide to jump off a cliff and see how long it takes. You are walking when WOOMP you fell into a deep dark crater, with no way out.

END OF PART 16

hey this is a great story very original but for some reson it doesnt seem funny to me. But is a very interesting story 8.9/10

MUDKIP RULES ONCE MORE!!!! great. no awesome. no greatest super cool mudkip story EVER!!!! MUDKIP 4 LIFE!!! I have dreams of this stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was right mudkip rules them all
111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am bookmarking this!

Deoxys should be on the moon!

Part 17

Black is all around you, except for a few dots at overhead. You hear nothing. You blindly trek around inside the crater when suddenly you're falling again. Drat, you think as you fall (well, at least you think you are since you can't see anything) down a pit. You land in a big floor, scattering much moon dust. Quite dazed you are.

____GTG_______________________________________________
*im back
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Looking around, you see a light in the center. As you approach it goes out. You are surprised by the sudden blackout that you jump backwards, falling into a previously avoided tunnel.

After more falling, you land in a well-lit room. You can see stars, as well as pointy markings, all through the cave walls. Suddenly, you hear a rustle behind you. You quickly do a back-lash on one of the markings, pushing it inwards. It starts shining.

You jump back aghast as all the markings on the walls start glowing. A beam shines out of every one, focusing a powerful shine in the center. The light pulsed and got bigger. And bigger. AND BIGGER. AND BIGGER AND BIGGER AND BIGGER,
until you were engulfed by the blazing light.

When you could open your eyes again you were surrounded by white. Looking around, you could see two things on the walls. One was a green gem. The other was a badge with a winged egg.

Below there was a plaque that said "One to keep, one to beat."

What did it all mean?????

________________________________________________________
GAME TIME!!!!!!

Which one would you choose???? Write in your rate!!!!!

yay steven died!!!!!!!! woooooot yay wooot hehe.
mudkip ended up on the moon? this story just gets weirder and funnyer all the time ok um I think that i will rate it at say
1googleplex = a relly big spaming number /10
anywho keep it up its sooooooo funny



ps steven died!