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 TDWH 2 - The Secret She Holds 
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Yeah, I sort of wrote this one quickly JUST so I could post it as soon as possible. If you've read my other fics, skip this part below, and go straight onto the much-awaited (all of four hours) sequel, but if you're new to my fanfics and just happen to have clicked this topic through my link, then check the hyperlinks below. ;)

The Final Battle - How the whole fanfic began.

The Darkness Within Him - Red's journey around Johto as he pursues the elusive Black Cardinal, while earning enough badges to scale Mt. Silver.

The Suffering He Endured The origins of Mewtwo, as shown through Red's eyes. Takes place during TDWH, but might have some unintentional spoilers. ;)

And now....the first chapter of The Secret She Holds:

Quote:
In the far east of the region of Johto, there is a tunnel that links Mahogany Town and Blackthorn City. It is called “The Frozen Cave.” Travellers have long used the pass, not straying from the path and venturing into the dark maze-like off shoots of the tunnel. Deep inside the Frozen Cave, following one of these tendrils from the path, is a great lake, literally frozen in time. A waterfall once crashed into the lake, but now, both the lake and the cascading water are still as stone. Spikes of water stray upwards, unmoving, and the ripples caused are immortalized in ice. There is no sound in this cave, save for the occasional wails of a mourning creature.

Two men, wrapped in warm fleeces to keep the chill of the cave from them, had ventured into the tunnel, seeking the source of this miserable creature. They carried staffs with them, wandering the intricate labyrinth that had yet to be recorded on a map. One of the men, his black hair hanging loosely round the sides of his face, turned to his companion.
“Such cold I have not felt, Morty, since I traversed the icy slopes of a far off region with a fair lady by the name of Glacia. And still, though the chill of that frozen country was bitter beyond anything I had experienced, this place feels my heart with a frost that far surpasses that of that frozen country.”

His companion smirked. “Yes, Eusine, it is cold,” he chuckled a little, fond of his friend.

The two of them had heard, from passing travellers, of a wretched howling deep within the cave, and had sought to find its cause. So here they found themselves in the tunnels of the Frozen Cave.

“Eusine, listen,” Morty suddenly said, interrupting his friend during an incredibly boring speech on the life cycle of a Kakuna. “What can you hear?”

The eccentric trainer paused and turned his head to the side. “Why,” he said after a pause, “my ears are filled with a cavernous silence, both empty and loud at the same time.”

Morty nodded, “exactly, you can’t hear anything. Where we are now, even the wild Pokemon of these parts are not crying. Pure and total silence.” He turned to look at his friend, a smile on his face. “We must be getting close.” Morty walked on, faster, his pace quickening with his excitement.

Having rounded a bend in the tight, narrow path through the rock, Morty and Eusine stepped into a great chamber.

“The Lake of Ice,” Morty muttered. “I’ve heard people talk of this place as they’ve passed through Ecruteak.”

“Indeed, many a horror-filled tale has circulated the lands around this dreadful cave,” Eusine added. “It is also said that here is where the sorrowful Pokemon sings its mournful melody…”

Morty stepped forward, walking over a natural bridge. “This part seems similar to a Pokemon arena,” he muttered.

“Most wonderful!” came Eusine’s excited cry. “My good friend, observe with eyes wide, for this is a scene most beautiful!” The eccentric man crouched on the frozen lake next to an intricate structure of ice. “The way the water must have frozen, it must have happened in the blink of an eye, or faster. Look how the shafts of ice rise, as if time itself has intervened…”

“Amazing,” Morty said, entirely lacking enthusiasm, before making his way back to the entrance.

“Morty,” came Eusine’s shaking voice. “Morty!”

Morty turned and saw Eusine backing away. The sound of breaking ice could be heard, so like breaking bones, and Eusine chanced a look at Morty. “What did you do?” the Ghost Gym Leader asked.

“I did nothing!” exclaimed Eusine as shards of ice now spat upwards.

The cracks in the ice widened and their radius spread. The two of them moved further back, and there was a smash that caused the both of them to flinch.

A hand shot rigidly out of the frozen lake. It felt about it, before pushing hard on the ice, causing more shards to fly this way and that. Eusine could feel his pulse quickening as the impossible happened before his eyes. Before long, a woman stood on the frozen lake, dusting ice crystals from her blouse and skirt. A black shape dropped from the ceiling; a Sneasel took its place next to its mistress.

“Are you some spectre from the afterlife,” Eusine enquired, voice quivering, “with a message from loved ones past?” he added hopefully.

“I’m no ghost,” the woman said, a manic smile on her face, “but I do have a message: Tell Red that Lorelei's coming for him.”


Okay, so it was short and probably more like an epilogue than a first chapter, but who cares? It's an update, right?

And yay, Eusine. ^_^

I'm going back to school tomorrow, so updates will become few and far between, I'm afraid. But look forward to them, with baited breath. Or else. :P

~Obs.

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Last edited by The Obsidian Wolf on Sun Feb 24, 2008 2:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.



Sun Feb 24, 2008 12:15 pm
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Oh my goodness, you started it straight away. I love how we're thrown into the thick of the action straight away. I really like the dynamic between Eusine and Morty, they're so nicely written.

But, Lorelei? I thought she'd died! I guess that's just what you wanted us to think, huh? I can't wait to see what happens.

Is it a bad thing I read 'Darkness within Him' before I read 'Final Battle'? I'm reading the latter now.

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Sun Feb 24, 2008 12:35 pm
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blu-suicune wrote:
Oh my goodness, you started it straight away. I love how we're thrown into the thick of the action straight away. I really like the dynamic between Eusine and Morty, they're so nicely written.


I tried to do the whole 'get the reader interested immediately.' I like it when I watch films / read books and you're put right in the plot immediately, and I detest it when they spend ages with giving you the character's history when it really isn't all that interetsting.

Quote:

But, Lorelei? I thought she'd died! I guess that's just what you wanted us to think, huh? I can't wait to see what happens.


I'm afraid it's quite a while until you find out exactly what the deal it with Lorelei coming back. I'm afraid I have used that solely as a hook and also as a way to bring Eusine back into the story (he's too good to drop. ;) )

Quote:

Is it a bad thing I read 'Darkness within Him' before I read 'Final Battle'? I'm reading the latter now.


Not at all. One of the things I try to do with my fics is make them so that you can read them, and in whatever order you read them, you'll find out something that correspends with it in another part of it. So, if you start reading the Mewtwo fic, then read TDWH, you don't think 'wth is with this plot?' you think 'that was a pretty good story,' and then once you've read TDWH you go 'oh, so that's the reason bla bla bla.' Whatever way you read it, it should all make sense, I hope.

And my technique was pretty...rough when I wrote The Final Battle, lol, so don't expect wonders. ;)

Next chapter will see Red getting a new Pokemon. But I don't know what, yet. I've done the plot, but neglected what Pokemon he'll encounter on the journey...hm...

Any ideas will be welcome. PM me with ideas for new POkemon that he can start off with. (That's open to anyway, btw ;) )

~Obs.

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Sun Feb 24, 2008 12:53 pm
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Sorry about skipping over "The Suffering he Endured". I just was never interested in 1.5 sequels. There just unnesesary to the plot. Not that it was a waste of time. I'm sure it was awesome.

Now, on to this!

Ooh, catchy. I'm not a huge fan of "set up" paragraphs that introduce circumstances, though.

There is also this:

Quote:
Two men, wrapped in warm fleeces to keep the chill of the cave from them, had ventured into the tunnel, seeking the source of this miserable creature.


Yoiu later said...

Quote:
The two of them had heard, from passing travellers, of a wretched howling deep within the cave, and had sought to find its cause.


This repetition can emphesize importance, but I caught it as I read, which can be bad. You need plenty of suff to happen in between the repetition to make the reader not notice it.

This can also cost you an effect of repetition, like in a favorite book of mine, Chew on This, which critisizes fast food. They repeated something they had said in the begining with a twist at the ending. This didn't work because I had forgotton this detail. Be careful.

Other then that, this was wonderful! I can't believe Lorelei was resurected. Perhaps by...Darkrai?!?! Nah, I'm probably wrong. Can't wait to see more!

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Sun Feb 24, 2008 1:27 pm
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God, can't you wait? I'm still struggling to construct my fics and you get TSSH started right away?!... Ahem, never mind.

Looks like you implemented the style "Make the reader get interested at once" very nicely and, although it's not my style, I can tell you it worked on me for a moment.

It seems that Red needed not to worry so much when he "killed" Lorelei now that we know he didn't do such thing... I wonder how will this develop and if Eusine will get more cameos this time... I guess he's too good to drop, as you say.

I must admit that my smile of excitement disappeared from my face when I read that the mourning creature was actually Lorelei, and if she said that she'll go for Red, then you're adding her as the main villian? If so... meh, I thought something else would happen here in TSSH.

But the only thing I can do now is to wait for more; as I cannot expect anything from this point. Keep up the good work and let's see if you trap me in this fic as you did in TDWH and The Suffering He Endured.

By the by, I'm typing my PMD fic as I type here! :o

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Sun Feb 24, 2008 1:43 pm
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AABM wrote:
God, can't you wait? I'm still struggling to construct my fics and you get TSSH started right away?!... Ahem, never mind.

Looks like you implemented the style "Make the reader get interested at once" very nicely and, although it's not my style, I can tell you it worked on me for a moment.

It seems that Red needed not to worry so much when he "killed" Lorelei now that we know he didn't do such thing... I wonder how will this develop and if Eusine will get more cameos this time... I guess he's too good to drop, as you say.


Lorelei's not exactly not dead, but you'll see later on in the fic. ;)

Quote:

I must admit that my smile of excitement disappeared from my face when I read that the mourning creature was actually Lorelei, and if she said that she'll go for Red, then you're adding her as the main villian? If so... meh, I thought something else would happen here in TSSH.


And as I read that I swore. The mourning creature was Lorelei's Sneasel, I was going to have it appear after Lorelei 'came back to life.' Crapping crap, I might have to just edit that in. The mourning creature is by no means Lorelei, and the same is said for her being the main villain. You'll see who that is later on. ;)

Quote:


But the only thing I can do now is to wait for more; as I cannot expect anything from this point. Keep up the good work and let's see if you trap me in this fic as you did in TDWH and The Suffering He Endured.

By the by, I'm typing my PMD fic as I type here! :o


Heheh, excellent. I'm glad I've hooked you on this one, and I'll look forward to reading yours. ;)

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Sun Feb 24, 2008 2:07 pm
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Obs, thanks for not leaving us hanging, waiting for The Secret She Holds. I like how your style of writing captivates the reader right away. I still have no idea how Loreli is still alive. Maybe....I really don't know. You have a way....of not revealing enough information, but pulling the reader in at the same time. It makes readers (like me, who will probably never make a fanfic) guess, and read even more of the fanfic to find out. Thanks for making my morning ! :) .

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Sat Mar 01, 2008 7:54 am
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yoyoyo4582 wrote:
Obs, thanks for not leaving us hanging, waiting for The Secret She Holds. I like how your style of writing captivates the reader right away. I still have no idea how Loreli is still alive. Maybe....I really don't know. You have a way....of not revealing enough information, but pulling the reader in at the same time. It makes readers (like me, who will probably never make a fanfic) guess, and read even more of the fanfic to find out. Thanks for making my morning ! :) .


Heheh, no problem! That's how I like to write, hook the reader, but leave them thrashing on the line for a while. Cruel? That's how you like it. ;)

Now, the reason for this post...

Sadly, the damned demon that is my internet is being highly temperemental; that's to say, it takes fifteen minutes for each hyperlink I click. So, to click forums / fanfiction / TDWH2 / Add Reply / Submit takes me over an hour. Not fun.

Thing is, it's only on Psypoke. Every other site works, and yet it only effects my computer.

So, what I've decided I'll do is save my chapters on a flash disk and take it to school with me. That means no updates on Saturdays; the writing will be done on a Saturday, but it won't be until Monday that you get the chapter, when I'm at school.

Sorry about that guys.

However, I left my house this morning with the second chapter nearly finished. I just need a closing paragraph...I'll finish it tonight and then maybe post it tomorrow morning. :)

Hope you look forward to it!

~Obs.

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Thu Mar 06, 2008 9:38 am
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Aw man, internet woes suck. I was kind of hoping this was going to be an update, you got my hopes up *looks shifty and hopes it doesn't look like she's stalking you or anything.*

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Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:52 am
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blu-suicune wrote:
Aw man, internet woes suck. I was kind of hoping this was going to be an update, you got my hopes up *looks shifty and hopes it doesn't look like she's stalking you or anything.*


Aw, sorry about getting your hopes up. It seems I was only a day late though. ;) Here's the next chapter!

Quote:
The white sand glistened like silver in the morning sun. A Krabby picked its way through the rocks that were just beginning to show themselves as the tide fell further out. The day would have been unbearably hot had it not been for the light breeze. The sea sighed as it revealed more of Mossdeep’s peaceful beach, and the Krabby paused. There was a sudden flash and it clicked its pincer as it shielded its eyes from the light. A Pokemon and its trainer had appeared. The Krabby surveyed the two for a moment, before returning to its aimless scuttling.

“You’re getting good at this, Alakazam,” the stranger said, straightening his jacket. “Long distance teleportation must be tiring, even for you,” he joked, recalling the Psychic Pokemon.

“So,” said Red, looking about the Mossdeep beach. “This is Hoenn.”

***

In the past, there had been concerns for the way Mossdeep City had been built. The island was not large, and the land that the city had been built on was only just above sea level. Some had worried when scientists informed them that even a marginal rise in the sea level would swamp the island, and had embarked on creating a solution. They decided that the great hill that the city was built around should have a place for protection, so that in the event of a flood, the whole population of the city could make their way up the hill and take shelter. They crafted a large building, nothing more than a big warehouse, with very little in it. They stationed a man and his family to live in it so that the place was occupied and did not fall into disrepair when they most needed it. He was paid by the council to live there, for he was doing them a favour, but soon, he and his family grew bored, sitting on the hill, doing nothing.

So he turned his gaze to the stars. Before long, he, his wife and his two twin daughters had equipped the warehouse with all the necessary items for astrology and more. That was how the Space Center came to be on Mossdeep Hill.

”Gramps!” Professor Oak turned and looked through the doors of the Space Center. A teenager walked through the door, his purple shirt unbuttoned while he tossed a poke ball up and down that was attached by a chain to his loose black jeans. “This better not be another one of your ‘great undertakings in Pokemon history.’”

Professor Oak put down the artifact that he had been studying. “Nothing of the sort, Blue” Oak chuckled. “I invited you here solely for your company. I also thought you might want to have a look at the items I found while traveling Kanto.”

“Could do,” Blue replied unenthusiastically. “Oh,” came Blue’s suddenly shocked voice. Oak turned.

“Hey Professor, I got your letter,” Red winked at Blue. “Your grandfather said you’d be here, I was actually hoping to have a battle later on.” There was a change about the trainer. He was somehow lighter, less burdened and he had a carefree smile on his face as he walked up to Blue and the Professor, jacket slung over his shoulder.

A mischievous smile spread across Blue’s face. “Any time, Red. I just wonder if you’ll be so confident when you know that I’m the Champion of the Elite Four!” He tossed his poke ball up in the air, before catching it and winking back at Red.

Former Champion, Blue,” Oak interrupted, not looking up from the large slab of rock that he was examining over the top of his glasses.

“You became Champion?” Red asked, barely able to stop his mouth from falling open in shock.

“Yup,” he replied. “I was expecting you to come barging through the doors right after me, and you should have done, I softened Lance up good and proper before you got there.”

Red laughed. “The less said about that battle the better. But wait; ‘former?’”

Blue looked away, and a rare serious quality surfaced in his voice. “I was completely wiped out. While you were running about Johto, collecting badges for some hiking expedition, I was training teams of Pokemon that combated every type. Then, just a few weeks ago, this sinister looking guy came through, having defeated Lance’s opponent. He destroyed me…”

Red arched an eyebrow. “Woah…that’s quite impressive, considering how all powerful you were.”

The sarcasm was missed on Blue. “Yeah, I know. There were stories of an amazingly powerful trainer traveling Kanto, wiping the Gym League out in a matter of days. And his identity was shrouded in mystery. All he gave was an alias; ‘Rex.’”

Professor Oak cleared his throat. “Yes, very interesting, you lost a Pokemon battle. I do wish you wouldn’t pile on the drama, Blue.” Red couldn’t help but hide a smirk.

“So when’s this meteor show, Gramps?” Blue replied in a loud voice.

”Ah yes!” Oak said, turning away from the stone slab. “That’s this evening; the meteors should be falling at approximately half past ten.”

“I suppose we’ll be watching it from here?” Red asked, and the Professor nodded.

“Yes, and it gives me some time to work on this blasted tablet,” he indicated to the large object he had been working on. Red looked over the Professor’s shoulder. The majority of the Professor’s workbench was covered by a large stone tablet with words written in an ancient language etched deep into the surface.

“What does it say?” Blue asked.

The Professor sighed impatiently. “If I knew that, I wouldn’t be studying it, now would I?” Red coughed to disguise a laugh. “Somebody sent this to me from a town off in the west, a man named Cozmo. He thought it would interest me and I’m afraid that all it has done is puzzled me.”

“Can’t you just look the language up in a book?” Once again, Blue’s question was answered with a frustrated sigh.

“No, Blue, I can’t. This language isn’t one that I, or any other expert in this field, have ever come across.”

Blue shrugged and muttered, “you seem to be Professor of everything…”

Oak either didn’t hear or chose to ignore the comment, for he turned to Red and said, “actually, I have something of a little more interest that I referenced in the letter I sent to you. Follow me.”

The Space Center, despite being an institution to study the stars, had a great deal more in it than Red had assumed. Shelves contained various items, stacked right to the roof of the great warehouse, and while they walked between the rows of artifacts, Red was struck with the notion of it being far more like a museum than a Space Center.

Red stopped, for something familiar had caught his eye. He crouched down and opened the glass cabinet to see a roughly cut wooden figure of a Ninetales. He reached out and picked up the small object.

“That was found in a cave, we think it may have been a simple little ornament,” said Oak, who had paused to wait for Red.

The young trainer did not hear, for his mind was swimming amongst painful images; Scarlet’s tearstained face, lit only by moonlight that streamed through an open window, before she vanished, Moltres’ Poke Ball in hand. That moment when he had given her his Pokemon in the Dragon’s Den would never leave him, for it had led to her death, his Pokemon’s death and the constant image of Xavier’s face, twisted by anger and hate as he struck Red across the jaw.

Red put the Ninetales back down, closed the cabinet and followed Oak and Blue to whatever the aging Professor wanted to show him.

***
Lorelei emerged from the upward spiraling slope that wound its way to the peak of Mt. Silver. Sneasel padded faithfully along beside her. The peak looked different on this cold, January morning, for the last time she had visited, it had been dark and stormy.

”I’m sorry to have summoned you here, away from your duties at the league,” Lance had said. “But we’ve run into some complications. It seems that Moltres has returned to Red. Darkrai won’t choose me unless Red has no legendary Pokemon.”

Lorelei nodded. “I see. Which do you want me to kill? The bird or the boy?”

“Preferably Red himself, but if you get the opportunity, destroy the phoenix as well. I have my own plans for a legendary Pokemon…”

“Messiah…” Lorelei began. “Red is constantly growing stronger. In the unlikely event that I fail…what will you do?”

“I will battle him myself, if it comes to it,” Lance replied, before releasing his Dragonite that shimmered in the moonlight air. Lorelei looked away; she had not been referring to Lance’s reaction to Red’s victory, but her own demise.

“Neither of them are here.”

Sneasel hissed and leapt round. Lorelei turned to face the newcomer. The figure stood between her and the cave from which she had come. The man’s attire was strikingly menacing; his black trousers contrasted greatly with the blood red shirt he wore. A similarly deep crimson robe was wrapped round his body and over his head, allowing only his mouth to be seen; the outfit would have looked incredibly ridiculous had it not been for the calm aura he exuded.

“And who are you?” Lorelei asked briskly.

“Neither of them are here,” he repeated, indicating with a sweep of his arm to the barren peak.

“Who?” retorted Lorelei, irritably. A deep growl emanated from her Ice type Pokemon.

“Your master, the Last Messiah, or Lance as he was known by most Pokemon trainers, and Red, the boy that sent you tumbling to your death.”

“If they aren’t here, then where are they?” Lorelei asked, disarmed by his extensive knowledge.

“Red recently arrived at Hoenn, while the Last Messiah…he is dead.” Lorelei took a step back. “Do not be shocked,” the man said, noticing her alarm. His voice was quiet, but commanding. “Lance was a fool to think Kanto would readily succumb to the idiotic notion of premature death; it is only logical that his own should follow.”

“Who are you?” Lorelei said again, an edge of urgency in her voice this time.

“My name is Rex,” the man replied and moved closer. “And I know what you desire most. Coincidentally, that is also what I want as well.”

The panic seemed to wear off, and Lorelei smirked. “Red’s death?” she asked, and the man named Rex nodded. “I lost to him last time, but when I meet him again…it will be different.”

“You’re right,” Rex said, and plunged a hand into his cloak. “And this time, you’ll have a new weapon.” With chilling speed, he drew out a gun and shot the woman in the chest. Lorelei was thrown back and Sneasel cried out with pain, as if it too had been attacked.

For a moment, there was nothing but the resounding echo of the gun’s blast and the skittering of Sneasel’s claws as it scampered about its fallen mistress.

Then, with a cry, Lorelei rolled over, breathing heavily. Sneasel leapt back in alarm. As she pulled herself to her feet, Rex walked over to her, helping her up.

”You can’t die, Lorelei,” Rex whispered. “You cannot die, because you are already dead.”

Lorelei drew shaking breaths as she felt her chest, but finding no blood. Rex’s hand guided her chin so that she looked up into his eyes. “How…?” was all she could manage.

Rex smiled, and his eyes widened manically. ”Because I was the one that brought you back.”


There's your evil super villain for this story. I've decided that this time round, rather than having a culmative explanation at the end of the story, I'll have an every-so-often update of what they're doing, while not giving anything away as to their motives / etc.


Also, I'm trying to work on character development this time round, seeing as everyone was a bit cut-and-dry in the last book. My aim is to become a better writer; last book, I focused on plot and keeping the reader hooked. In this book, I want to try and retain that idea while making the characters seem colourful. And in the third book...I'll my hand at humour and dramatic scenes. I'm still not very good at those sort, lol.

Oh, and yes; they have guns in the Pokemon world. :P

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Fri Mar 07, 2008 9:41 am
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This is looking interesting already! I liked your explanation of the Space Centre on Mossdeep (hooray for Mossdeep!).
Are the twin daughters supposed to be Tate and Liza? Because Tate's a boy ^^;

And Lorelei's a zombie? A vampire? I'm intriuged!

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Fri Mar 07, 2008 1:45 pm
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I KNEW she had died and came back to life!

I like how you described how the space station came to be and tate and Liza(Other then Tate being a boy and all)

Characters in this, humer and drama in the nex-wait a second! There's a third? YES! *Dances for joy* CEEEELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!

*Gasps* I'm done now. *reads that there is a third book again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...

*gasps* And you weren't even going to make a sequel to "The Final Battle" originally! *Reads again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...

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Fri Mar 07, 2008 4:07 pm
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Now, there is a third book for real? That leads me to think that the creation of a "2.5" thing is not needed.[/wildguess]

Aha, let's review this last installment...

· Lorelei turns out to be an undead, looking forward to killing Red (wth, rhyme!) :o

· There is this unknown guy by the alias of "Rex" who is also aiming to kill Red, and also revieved Lorelei from her icy tomb, let's see what's his relation with Lance.

· The Last Messiah, or Lance, is wanting to be 'Chosen' by this Darkrai for some, still unknown, reason and is basically the one who wants Red out because he owns a Legendary.

· Does anybody else hate Red so much to want him dead, or anything?

· What I have said so far is by any means wrong? :?

What I can say, my friend, is that I'm liking your style and how you make the flow of the story go rather than the plot itself. But let's remember I know little about what this story can become when it grows, so yeah.

I'm still uncertain wether I rather like or rather not like the plot itself, but only the time will tell.

*Hopes the story gets interesting, watches the topic for replies, and is off to resume his own fics... if he finds any inspiration*

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Fri Mar 07, 2008 5:09 pm
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I'm pretty sure the scene with Lance was in the past and being remembered, based off the fact that it was in italics.

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Fri Mar 07, 2008 5:48 pm
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Pokemon Master
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Thunder_dude7 wrote:
I'm pretty sure the scene with Lance was in the past and being remembered, based off the fact that it was in italics.


Yeah, got it one. Italics = stress or flash back when I use it, pretty much.

Quote:
The Last Messiah, or Lance, is wanting to be 'Chosen' by this Darkrai for some, still unknown, reason and is basically the one who wants Red out because he owns a Legendary.


Lance is sort of dead. Well, on sort of, he is. He leaped off the top of Silph Co, remember? The bit in italics was to give Lorelei a bit more depth to her character; sort of implying she has something of a crush on Lance? Of course, I probably won't take it any further, because it will seem a bit...childish, and that's not how I want to portray Lorelei. So I think I'll just infer it, but not explicitly say it. ;)

There has been a series of unfortunate events (lol) that have actually led to fortuitous ones. Where my computer had been crap and wouldn't allow Psypoke, it has now completely cut the internet off altogether. Oddly enough, my sister's internet is fine. So, I can access her computer quite easily.

So, you are all blessed with another update, woot!

Quote:
Red had been wondering for some time what the artifact in Oak’s letter was, and when the Professor, having guided he and Blue through the maze of shelves and astrological instruments, pulled out a box no bigger than a shoebox from a well-hidden safe, the young trainer was slightly disappointed.

“I was expecting something a bit bigger,” Red muttered.

Oak unlocked the padlock that fastened the box shut and raised the lid. Both he and Blue craned their necks to see the object within.

“This is the Emerald Orb,” the Professor said, carefully lifting the item out with both hands, holding it delicately, as if would suddenly implode if he applied even a small amount of pressure. Red was still largely unimpressed, but there was a glittering quality to the Orb that appealed to him. It was a very bright green and surprisingly large as it was held suspended by Oak’s hands. “I found it amongst the ruins of Saffron City,” Oak was saying, “after I volunteered to help rebuild the place. It seemed quite lucky that I had received an invite from the town’s Gym Leader to come and stay to watch the meteor shower, because it has allowed me to take advantage of their superior machinery.”

”So…” Red began, “what does it actually do?” He had his hands in his pockets and seemed entirely disengaged with the unexciting Orb.

“Can’t you just appreciate it for its beauty?” Oak asked, but before he waited for an answer, he continued, “but yes, it does ‘do’ something actually. Look, I’ll show you.”

“Once we’ve shaken Gramps loose, fancy a battle?” Blue whispered as he and Red followed the Professor.

Red nodded eagerly. “I’ll test you and see if you’ve got any better,” he said, and laughed at Blue’s indignant reaction.

“Watch,” came Oak’s voice, stopping suddenly, a small distance away from the Center’s exit. “Red, Blue, go and stand next to the stone tablet.” The two trainers did so, exchanging bemused looks. Professor Oak walked slowly forward. “This is what the Orb does,” the Professor whispered, as if speaking any louder might offend and discourage the Orb from acting. The item had begun glowing, as if there was a small candle dancing in its center, and the faintest rumble could be heard in the room. As the distance between Oak and the tablet closed, the Orb seemed to explode with vivid light, and the rumble grew louder. Everything that hadn’t been fixed to the ground began to shake and rattle while the light grew steadily brighter as Oak moved forward. Red pulled an arm up to shield his face from the blinding light.

“No!” cried Oak over the din of the rumbling and shaking, “look at the tablet!” Red squinted and lowered his arm. The characters on the tablet seemed to be moving. The effect of the Orb’s light made each individual letter shake slightly, as if it was trying to break free from something. Then Oak moved back, wrenching the Orb with incredible strength with him, as if it took great force to do so.

“That,” Oak gasped, “is why we keep the Orb as far away from the tablet as possible. Even having the Orb at the other end of the Center makes the tablet difficult to read, and it can be quite difficult trying to find a translation for a language that won’t keep still.”

“Pretty cool, no?” Blue asked Red, as if the Orb belonged to him. “I was the one who found that out as well,” he boasted.

“Remember the circumstances under which you made your discovery, Blue,” Oak called over his shoulder as he took the Orb back to its safe.

Red looked at Blue quizzically. “Did you want a battle?” Blue asked hurriedly.

Red nodded. “Sure, but only if you tell me how you found out about the Orb,” he laughed as Blue squirmed.

“I was teaching my Eevee to fetch,” he said sheepishly.

***

The day, had you asked any passing trainer, was perfect for a battle. Clear skies with a brisk wind made battling as smooth as possible. The expanse of lawn that stretched out from the Space Center, before rolling down a gentle slope to the more populated part of the city was the ideal place to form an arena.

“I say we go for an all out six on six,” Blue decided.

Red shook his head. “No way, I haven’t got the patience to thrash every single one of your Pokemon. Two will be fine.”

Blue shrugged. “Whatever, let’s just battle! I’ll lead with Exeggutor!” he hurled his Poke ball forward, and a large bipedal Pokemon appeared. It had three manic faces, each one with a different and highly exaggerated expression on them, and had a tuft of spiked leaves that seemed to make up its hair.

“Nidoking! Let’s go!” called Red. The ground type stomped into the arena. “Let’s not waste time,” Red ordered, “lead with Take Down!”

“Exeggutor, Sunny Day!” Exeggutor raised its faces to the sky, and the sun’s beams intensified.

“Is your Pokemon too slow to bother ordering evasive action?” Red teased as Nidoking barreled into the Grass type.

“Well, it was,” Blue replied, as his Pokemon went flying over his head, “but now, I’m not so sure…Solarbeam! Then Razor Leaf and Bullet Seed!” Whether or not Blue had planned it, Red could not say, but the way in which the blast of light sliced just past Blue’s shoulder and caused his clothes to flap about dramatically was undeniably stylish.

The attack hit Nidoking in the stomach, and the Pokemon was hurled back. A storm of leaves and smaller bursts of energy attacks formed an unavoidable assault, especially to the fallen Pokemon.

“Nidoking, get up and use Earthquake!” Red’s order fell on deaf ears, for his Pokemon had passed out. Red recalled the ground type, before hurling out another Pokemon. “Venusaur, don’t give it chance to attack! Seed Bomb!” From the center of the grass Pokemon’s flower, a large pod appeared, before being fired, accompanied by the bizarre sound of a canon.

“Exeggutor, dodge it, and use Seed Bomb too!” Blue called.

Red could only shake his head in wonder as the bulky Pokemon speedily avoided the attack, before firing its own attack at Venusaur.

“How are you-?”

“Chlorophyll,” Blue said, cutting across Red. He indicated to the sky. “Exeggutor’s speed doubles in the sun, that’s why it’s running circles round your Venusaur! Attack with Psychic!” An aura suddenly surrounded both Grass Pokemon, and Venusaur was raised into the air.

“Venusaur! Vine Whip!” called Red. “Grab hold of Exeggutor!” Venusaur wrapped the thick vines round Exeggutor’s body, before the psychic type’s eyes flashed purple, powering Venusaur backwards and into the air. Venusaur, however, pulled the vines taut, and the effect of doing so caused Venusaur to become a pivot. It spun round in the air, turning its momentum into strength, before launching Exeggutor further, and with greater strength.

“Return,” Blue called, sending the red beam lancing toward Exeggutor who was shrinking into the distance. The Pokemon vanished inside the ball as Venusaur landed with a stomp on the ground. “Let’s end this, Red,” Blue said, a confident smirk on his face.

“Yes, let’s,” Red replied.

Blue threw his second Pokemon out, and Red felt his stomach sink. The orange Pokemon roared and threw out its wings, before blasting a jet of fire into the sky.

“****.”

“Charizard,” Blue yelled, “Use Flamethrower!” The dragon powered its wings and rose into the sky. Venusaur watched, eyes wide, as it blasted an intense stream of fire at it.

“Solarbeam!” Red called, and Venusaur took advantage of the sun to fire its attack immediately. The beam lanced through the fire and struck Charizard on the wing, causing the Pokemon to bank and land. The fire attack, however, was not dispelled, and it engulfed Venusaur.

Blue laughed as he ordered his second attack. “Fire Spin!’ Charizard flapped its wings once, sending a great tornado whirling towards Red’s Pokemon. The fire was molded into a spiraling inferno, and Red wrenched out his Poke Ball as he heard Venusaur’s pained cries.

“Return!” he cried, and the beam of light vanished into the fire, before pulling the Pokemon into the ball. The fire dissipated.

“That was good,” Blue said, walking over to Red, hand extended. Red took it, and nodded.

“Yeah,” he said, “though it was a bit of a one-sided match. You swept me,” he added, a little disbelievingly.

Blue laughed, before raising a hand; “champion?” he said, and laughed again.

“How many times?” came Oak’s voice as he walked towards the duo, “Former champion, Blue, former.

Blue rolled his eyes. “Yeah, for less than a year. That’s just embarrassing Gramps.”

“I was watching your battle,” Oak continued, ignoring his grandson. “And I think that you need a change of scene, Red.”

Red arched an eyebrow; he knew what was coming. “Professor, please, I’ve trained these Pokemon-“

“Yes, and with their power, you’ve grown arrogant,” Oak said seriously. “I think that you should leave your Pokemon with me, and start afresh. Who knows, you could even take on the Hoenn league.”

Red shook his head; he’d had it with Leagues for now. “I promise,” Red pleaded, “I can become a better trainer!”

Oak nodded. “Yes, you can, but the better trainer has even more Pokemon. I also think you relied too heavily on Moltres,” he said. “And besides, you’ve been neglecting the errand I sent you on. I doubt you still even have the Pokedex I leant you.”

Red bit his lip, before searching through his rucksack. He presented the red gadget to the Professor. The Pokedex creaked as Oak opened it. “Seen: rather a lot. Captured: not even a fraction of them.” He snapped the gadget shut and handed it back to Red. “If you have no Pokemon, Red, you’re going to have to capture some new ones to train,” he laughed. “I’m sorry to be so hard on you, but this benefits the both of us; I get to fulfill my dream of cataloguing every Pokemon in the world, and you get to improve your skills as a trainer. Is that fair?”

Red nodded. There was no arguing about it, he had grown arrogant and over-confident in his skills, and they had not been warranted; losing to Blue had shown that much.

“What about Blue,” Red said suddenly, “is he keeping his Pokemon?”

Oak nodded, but Blue cut in. “Red, I’ve assembled teams of Pokemon that can beat any Pokemon type; that means capturing a lot of Pokemon,” he added, speaking slowly and nodding, before laughing at his mockery.

Red turned to the Professor. “Can I at least keep my Alakazam?” he asked. “We’re on an island, and I don’t much like the idea of being stuck here with no way of getting off.”

Professor Oak sighed deeply, evidently thinking. “No. You can keep Gyarados, it’s still quite new to you, isn’t it? You’ve had Alakazam for too long, whereas you’re not accustomed to Gyarados’ temper tantrums. And it can swim, so you’re not stuck here, either. Oh! Follow me.”

He suddenly turned, and Red had no option but to follow the aging man.

***

“It would not be fair to take your Pokemon away without at least giving you a new one,” Oak said when they had got back inside of the Space Center. He handed Red a Poke Ball.

“What about me Gramps?” Blue asked indignantly.

“Hold on, Blue, you can have- wait, you’re keeping your Pokemon, shush for a moment.” Blue ****** at his forgetful grandfather.

Red took the Poke Ball, before handing the other four of his own over. He didn’t want to open each of them and see their sad faces as he parted with them. Instead he squeezed each of them in their Poke Balls. Arcanine, Venusaur, Alakazam, and Nidoking. His belt looked empty with only one Poke Ball hanging there.

“What Pokemon is this one, Professor?” Red asked suddenly, indicating to the Poke Ball in his hand.

Oak smiled. “Open it up and see.”

Red dropped the ball on the ground and it burst open. A small Pokemon fluttered up, frantically flapping its wings to stay airbourne. It smiled giddily as it buzzed in front of Red’s face, before landing on his head and nesting in his hair to sleep.

“A Ledyba,” Blue said, holding in a laugh. “Red’s starter Pokemon is a Ledyba.” He turned away as if to hide his fit of laughter, but was unsuccessful.

“Ignore Blue,” Oak said calmly, “Ledyba can grow to be very powerful Pokemon.” Red blushed furiously as he heard Blue laugh even louder .

“When does the meteor shower start?” Red asked, as he put his hand above his head and dropped the Poke Ball. Ledyba’s eyes widened and it jumped out of the way, bringing tears to Red’s eyes as the ball fell on his head. He caught the ball, and shook his head so that Ledyba fell off, sliding down his back.

“Not long now,” Oak replied, “enough time for you to get acquainted with your new Pokemon.” He indicated to Ledyba, who now sat on Red’s shoulder, gawping wide eyed and mouth open at its new trainer with adoration.

Red sighed deeply. “Great.”



That's the last time I attempted humour, I think, it strikes me as being a little forced in places. But Ledyba, <3. I do like Ledyba. ^_^

Once again, I've misinterpreted how badly I ramble on; I thought that I would have covered this all in the first chapter, but it's taken me two, lol. And I'll be running onto a third...good god. This is going to take ages. :P


Quote:
And Lorelei's a zombie? A vampire? I'm intriuged!


Mwa ha, neither, you'll see. ;)

Quote:

Are the twin daughters supposed to be Tate and Liza? Because Tate's a boy ^^;


Whoops, I thought they were twin girls. I thought Tate was a bit masculine...lol, I'll edit that.

Quote:
*gasps* And you weren't even going to make a sequel to "The Final Battle" originally! *Reads again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...
I KNEW she had died and came back to life!

I like how you described how the space station came to be and tate and Liza(Other then Tate being a boy and all)

Characters in this, humer and drama in the nex-wait a second! There's a third? YES! *Dances for joy* CEEEELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!

*Gasps* I'm done now. *reads that there is a third book again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...

*gasps* And you weren't even going to make a sequel to "The Final Battle" originally! *Reads again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...


Yeah, I know. To think that this was just a one off...I intended for Red to win again and the so called 'cliffhanger' would be

"Omg! Lance wasn't the Champion?! BLUE was?!" and then it would end.

But now look...Red became an emo, had to cope with the Lord of some other world, made friends, collected the eight badges of Johto, witnessed the two titans of Johto wreck the burned tower (bet you all forgot about that one :P ), climb to the top of Mt. Silver, find out that Lance was, in fact, behind it all, and then kill his two main rivals (Lance and Lorelei.)

Oh, and I don't know if you all picked up on it, but note where Lance found the Emerald Orb...and then think what the Orbs do...that's all I'm saying on that little hint. ;)

Look forward to the next update or else! :P

~Obs.

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"Play with fire and expect to be burned."


Sun Mar 09, 2008 5:22 am
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Pokemon Master
Pokemon Master
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Joined: Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:03 am
Posts: 1559
Location: Dragon's Den
Thunder_dude7 wrote:
I'm pretty sure the scene with Lance was in the past and being remembered, based off the fact that it was in italics.


Yeah, got it one. Italics = stress or flash back when I use it, pretty much.

Quote:
The Last Messiah, or Lance, is wanting to be 'Chosen' by this Darkrai for some, still unknown, reason and is basically the one who wants Red out because he owns a Legendary.


Lance is sort of dead. Well, on sort of, he is. He leaped off the top of Silph Co, remember? The bit in italics was to give Lorelei a bit more depth to her character; sort of implying she has something of a crush on Lance? Of course, I probably won't take it any further, because it will seem a bit...childish, and that's not how I want to portray Lorelei. So I think I'll just infer it, but not explicitly say it. ;)

There has been a series of unfortunate events (lol) that have actually led to fortuitous ones. Where my computer had been crap and wouldn't allow Psypoke, it has now completely cut the internet off altogether. Oddly enough, my sister's internet is fine. So, I can access her computer quite easily.

So, you are all blessed with another update, woot!

Quote:
Red had been wondering for some time what the artifact in Oak’s letter was, and when the Professor, having guided he and Blue through the maze of shelves and astrological instruments, pulled out a box no bigger than a shoebox from a well-hidden safe, the young trainer was slightly disappointed.

“I was expecting something a bit bigger,” Red muttered.

Oak unlocked the padlock that fastened the box shut and raised the lid. Both he and Blue craned their necks to see the object within.

“This is the Emerald Orb,” the Professor said, carefully lifting the item out with both hands, holding it delicately, as if would suddenly implode if he applied even a small amount of pressure. Red was still largely unimpressed, but there was a glittering quality to the Orb that appealed to him. It was a very bright green and surprisingly large as it was held suspended by Oak’s hands. “I found it amongst the ruins of Saffron City,” Oak was saying, “after I volunteered to help rebuild the place. It seemed quite lucky that I had received an invite from the town’s Gym Leader to come and stay to watch the meteor shower, because it has allowed me to take advantage of their superior machinery.”

”So…” Red began, “what does it actually do?” He had his hands in his pockets and seemed entirely disengaged with the unexciting Orb.

“Can’t you just appreciate it for its beauty?” Oak asked, but before he waited for an answer, he continued, “but yes, it does ‘do’ something actually. Look, I’ll show you.”

“Once we’ve shaken Gramps loose, fancy a battle?” Blue whispered as he and Red followed the Professor.

Red nodded eagerly. “I’ll test you and see if you’ve got any better,” he said, and laughed at Blue’s indignant reaction.

“Watch,” came Oak’s voice, stopping suddenly, a small distance away from the Center’s exit. “Red, Blue, go and stand next to the stone tablet.” The two trainers did so, exchanging bemused looks. Professor Oak walked slowly forward. “This is what the Orb does,” the Professor whispered, as if speaking any louder might offend and discourage the Orb from acting. The item had begun glowing, as if there was a small candle dancing in its center, and the faintest rumble could be heard in the room. As the distance between Oak and the tablet closed, the Orb seemed to explode with vivid light, and the rumble grew louder. Everything that hadn’t been fixed to the ground began to shake and rattle while the light grew steadily brighter as Oak moved forward. Red pulled an arm up to shield his face from the blinding light.

“No!” cried Oak over the din of the rumbling and shaking, “look at the tablet!” Red squinted and lowered his arm. The characters on the tablet seemed to be moving. The effect of the Orb’s light made each individual letter shake slightly, as if it was trying to break free from something. Then Oak moved back, wrenching the Orb with incredible strength with him, as if it took great force to do so.

“That,” Oak gasped, “is why we keep the Orb as far away from the tablet as possible. Even having the Orb at the other end of the Center makes the tablet difficult to read, and it can be quite difficult trying to find a translation for a language that won’t keep still.”

“Pretty cool, no?” Blue asked Red, as if the Orb belonged to him. “I was the one who found that out as well,” he boasted.

“Remember the circumstances under which you made your discovery, Blue,” Oak called over his shoulder as he took the Orb back to its safe.

Red looked at Blue quizzically. “Did you want a battle?” Blue asked hurriedly.

Red nodded. “Sure, but only if you tell me how you found out about the Orb,” he laughed as Blue squirmed.

“I was teaching my Eevee to fetch,” he said sheepishly.

***

The day, had you asked any passing trainer, was perfect for a battle. Clear skies with a brisk wind made battling as smooth as possible. The expanse of lawn that stretched out from the Space Center, before rolling down a gentle slope to the more populated part of the city was the ideal place to form an arena.

“I say we go for an all out six on six,” Blue decided.

Red shook his head. “No way, I haven’t got the patience to thrash every single one of your Pokemon. Two will be fine.”

Blue shrugged. “Whatever, let’s just battle! I’ll lead with Exeggutor!” he hurled his Poke ball forward, and a large bipedal Pokemon appeared. It had three manic faces, each one with a different and highly exaggerated expression on them, and had a tuft of spiked leaves that seemed to make up its hair.

“Nidoking! Let’s go!” called Red. The ground type stomped into the arena. “Let’s not waste time,” Red ordered, “lead with Take Down!”

“Exeggutor, Sunny Day!” Exeggutor raised its faces to the sky, and the sun’s beams intensified.

“Is your Pokemon too slow to bother ordering evasive action?” Red teased as Nidoking barreled into the Grass type.

“Well, it was,” Blue replied, as his Pokemon went flying over his head, “but now, I’m not so sure…Solarbeam! Then Razor Leaf and Bullet Seed!” Whether or not Blue had planned it, Red could not say, but the way in which the blast of light sliced just past Blue’s shoulder and caused his clothes to flap about dramatically was undeniably stylish.

The attack hit Nidoking in the stomach, and the Pokemon was hurled back. A storm of leaves and smaller bursts of energy attacks formed an unavoidable assault, especially to the fallen Pokemon.

“Nidoking, get up and use Earthquake!” Red’s order fell on deaf ears, for his Pokemon had passed out. Red recalled the ground type, before hurling out another Pokemon. “Venusaur, don’t give it chance to attack! Seed Bomb!” From the center of the grass Pokemon’s flower, a large pod appeared, before being fired, accompanied by the bizarre sound of a canon.

“Exeggutor, dodge it, and use Seed Bomb too!” Blue called.

Red could only shake his head in wonder as the bulky Pokemon speedily avoided the attack, before firing its own attack at Venusaur.

“How are you-?”

“Chlorophyll,” Blue said, cutting across Red. He indicated to the sky. “Exeggutor’s speed doubles in the sun, that’s why it’s running circles round your Venusaur! Attack with Psychic!” An aura suddenly surrounded both Grass Pokemon, and Venusaur was raised into the air.

“Venusaur! Vine Whip!” called Red. “Grab hold of Exeggutor!” Venusaur wrapped the thick vines round Exeggutor’s body, before the psychic type’s eyes flashed purple, powering Venusaur backwards and into the air. Venusaur, however, pulled the vines taut, and the effect of doing so caused Venusaur to become a pivot. It spun round in the air, turning its momentum into strength, before launching Exeggutor further, and with greater strength.

“Return,” Blue called, sending the red beam lancing toward Exeggutor who was shrinking into the distance. The Pokemon vanished inside the ball as Venusaur landed with a stomp on the ground. “Let’s end this, Red,” Blue said, a confident smirk on his face.

“Yes, let’s,” Red replied.

Blue threw his second Pokemon out, and Red felt his stomach sink. The orange Pokemon roared and threw out its wings, before blasting a jet of fire into the sky.

“****.”

“Charizard,” Blue yelled, “Use Flamethrower!” The dragon powered its wings and rose into the sky. Venusaur watched, eyes wide, as it blasted an intense stream of fire at it.

“Solarbeam!” Red called, and Venusaur took advantage of the sun to fire its attack immediately. The beam lanced through the fire and struck Charizard on the wing, causing the Pokemon to bank and land. The fire attack, however, was not dispelled, and it engulfed Venusaur.

Blue laughed as he ordered his second attack. “Fire Spin!’ Charizard flapped its wings once, sending a great tornado whirling towards Red’s Pokemon. The fire was molded into a spiraling inferno, and Red wrenched out his Poke Ball as he heard Venusaur’s pained cries.

“Return!” he cried, and the beam of light vanished into the fire, before pulling the Pokemon into the ball. The fire dissipated.

“That was good,” Blue said, walking over to Red, hand extended. Red took it, and nodded.

“Yeah,” he said, “though it was a bit of a one-sided match. You swept me,” he added, a little disbelievingly.

Blue laughed, before raising a hand; “champion?” he said, and laughed again.

“How many times?” came Oak’s voice as he walked towards the duo, “Former champion, Blue, former.

Blue rolled his eyes. “Yeah, for less than a year. That’s just embarrassing Gramps.”

“I was watching your battle,” Oak continued, ignoring his grandson. “And I think that you need a change of scene, Red.”

Red arched an eyebrow; he knew what was coming. “Professor, please, I’ve trained these Pokemon-“

“Yes, and with their power, you’ve grown arrogant,” Oak said seriously. “I think that you should leave your Pokemon with me, and start afresh. Who knows, you could even take on the Hoenn league.”

Red shook his head; he’d had it with Leagues for now. “I promise,” Red pleaded, “I can become a better trainer!”

Oak nodded. “Yes, you can, but the better trainer has even more Pokemon. I also think you relied too heavily on Moltres,” he said. “And besides, you’ve been neglecting the errand I sent you on. I doubt you still even have the Pokedex I leant you.”

Red bit his lip, before searching through his rucksack. He presented the red gadget to the Professor. The Pokedex creaked as Oak opened it. “Seen: rather a lot. Captured: not even a fraction of them.” He snapped the gadget shut and handed it back to Red. “If you have no Pokemon, Red, you’re going to have to capture some new ones to train,” he laughed. “I’m sorry to be so hard on you, but this benefits the both of us; I get to fulfill my dream of cataloguing every Pokemon in the world, and you get to improve your skills as a trainer. Is that fair?”

Red nodded. There was no arguing about it, he had grown arrogant and over-confident in his skills, and they had not been warranted; losing to Blue had shown that much.

“What about Blue,” Red said suddenly, “is he keeping his Pokemon?”

Oak nodded, but Blue cut in. “Red, I’ve assembled teams of Pokemon that can beat any Pokemon type; that means capturing a lot of Pokemon,” he added, speaking slowly and nodding, before laughing at his mockery.

Red turned to the Professor. “Can I at least keep my Alakazam?” he asked. “We’re on an island, and I don’t much like the idea of being stuck here with no way of getting off.”

Professor Oak sighed deeply, evidently thinking. “No. You can keep Gyarados, it’s still quite new to you, isn’t it? You’ve had Alakazam for too long, whereas you’re not accustomed to Gyarados’ temper tantrums. And it can swim, so you’re not stuck here, either. Oh! Follow me.”

He suddenly turned, and Red had no option but to follow the aging man.

***

“It would not be fair to take your Pokemon away without at least giving you a new one,” Oak said when they had got back inside of the Space Center. He handed Red a Poke Ball.

“What about me Gramps?” Blue asked indignantly.

“Hold on, Blue, you can have- wait, you’re keeping your Pokemon, shush for a moment.” Blue ****** at his forgetful grandfather.

Red took the Poke Ball, before handing the other four of his own over. He didn’t want to open each of them and see their sad faces as he parted with them. Instead he squeezed each of them in their Poke Balls. Arcanine, Venusaur, Alakazam, and Nidoking. His belt looked empty with only one Poke Ball hanging there.

“What Pokemon is this one, Professor?” Red asked suddenly, indicating to the Poke Ball in his hand.

Oak smiled. “Open it up and see.”

Red dropped the ball on the ground and it burst open. A small Pokemon fluttered up, frantically flapping its wings to stay airbourne. It smiled giddily as it buzzed in front of Red’s face, before landing on his head and nesting in his hair to sleep.

“A Ledyba,” Blue said, holding in a laugh. “Red’s starter Pokemon is a Ledyba.” He turned away as if to hide his fit of laughter, but was unsuccessful.

“Ignore Blue,” Oak said calmly, “Ledyba can grow to be very powerful Pokemon.” Red blushed furiously as he heard Blue laugh even louder .

“When does the meteor shower start?” Red asked, as he put his hand above his head and dropped the Poke Ball. Ledyba’s eyes widened and it jumped out of the way, bringing tears to Red’s eyes as the ball fell on his head. He caught the ball, and shook his head so that Ledyba fell off, sliding down his back.

“Not long now,” Oak replied, “enough time for you to get acquainted with your new Pokemon.” He indicated to Ledyba, who now sat on Red’s shoulder, gawping wide eyed and mouth open at its new trainer with adoration.

Red sighed deeply. “Great.”



That's the last time I attempted humour, I think, it strikes me as being a little forced in places. But Ledyba, <3. I do like Ledyba. ^_^

Once again, I've misinterpreted how badly I ramble on; I thought that I would have covered this all in the first chapter, but it's taken me two, lol. And I'll be running onto a third...good god. This is going to take ages. :P


Quote:
And Lorelei's a zombie? A vampire? I'm intriuged!


Mwa ha, neither, you'll see. ;)

Quote:

Are the twin daughters supposed to be Tate and Liza? Because Tate's a boy ^^;


Whoops, I thought they were twin girls. I thought Tate was a bit masculine...lol, I'll edit that.

Quote:
*gasps* And you weren't even going to make a sequel to "The Final Battle" originally! *Reads again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...
I KNEW she had died and came back to life!

I like how you described how the space station came to be and tate and Liza(Other then Tate being a boy and all)

Characters in this, humer and drama in the nex-wait a second! There's a third? YES! *Dances for joy* CEEEELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!

*Gasps* I'm done now. *reads that there is a third book again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...

*gasps* And you weren't even going to make a sequel to "The Final Battle" originally! *Reads again* CEEEELABRATE GOOD TIMES...


Yeah, I know. To think that this was just a one off...I intended for Red to win again and the so called 'cliffhanger' would be

"Omg! Lance wasn't the Champion?! BLUE was?!" and then it would end.

But now look...Red became an emo, had to cope with the Lord of some other world, made friends, collected the eight badges of Johto, witnessed the two titans of Johto wreck the burned tower (bet you all forgot about that one :P ), climb to the top of Mt. Silver, find out that Lance was, in fact, behind it all, and then kill his two main rivals (Lance and Lorelei.)

Oh, and I don't know if you all picked up on it, but note where Lance found the Emerald Orb...and then think what the Orbs do...that's all I'm saying on that little hint. ;)

Look forward to the next update or else! :P

~Obs.

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Sun Mar 09, 2008 5:23 am
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Other then the double post, that was great!

Ledyba? Ledyba? YOU GAVE RED A LADYBA?!?!?!? THANK YOU!!!! LEDYBA IS AWESOME!!!! CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!!!

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Sun Mar 09, 2008 6:26 am
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I just cannot hold a smile in my mouth, I have to admit that this chapter was quite of my liking; some humour here and there, Oak being (kind of) mean to Blue... and... well, you gave Red a Ledyba... that was the point above the i for me and this chap :P

Now I should be wondering wether this Emerald Orb resembles Rayquaza as the Red and Blue Orbs were connected to Groudon and Kyogre respectively... or if it doesn't.

Meh, you're creative enough to think up something different, ain'tcha?

Oh and this incoming so-called "Meteor Shower", it leads me to believe that Ledyba will turn into a Ledian that night, seeing as Ledian is fond of starlight[/wildguess] :o... and if not, then it'll help the Ladybug evolve... and if not... well... I just think the two of them must be connected somehow, the bug and the meteor shower.

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· Say, Orange looks better than gray, doesn't it?


Sun Mar 09, 2008 3:31 pm
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Hahah, I laughed a bit when Red got a Ledyba. Ledyba! A funny little bug. Sorry, I never had much love for the bugs. We'll see how it goes.

Also, I liked how you brought in the Green Orb- a reference to the manga, perhaps? I know there was one in there.
This is getting interesting..!

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Mon Mar 10, 2008 7:27 am
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blu-suicune wrote:
Hahah, I laughed a bit when Red got a Ledyba. Ledyba! A funny little bug. Sorry, I never had much love for the bugs. We'll see how it goes.

Also, I liked how you brought in the Green Orb- a reference to the manga, perhaps? I know there was one in there.
This is getting interesting..!


I hadn't realised it was, actually, though I greatly missed an Emerald Orb in Pokemon Emerald. Hence I included it in this fic. It's actually an integral part of this story, you'll see why next chapter. ;)

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Mon Mar 10, 2008 1:05 pm
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Oh, I agree- they absolutely should have had a Green Orb!

Looking forward to seeing where you take this!

(I hope I don't come across as stalkerish. I've just never been this psyched about a fanfic before ^^; )

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Mon Mar 10, 2008 4:51 pm
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It was nice to see Red get swept, even if only as an excuse to have him "start over". ;)

I applaud Ledyba! Hell yes for Oak not doling out a standard starter! And hell yes for Blue not being a total dickhead, but rather a decent fellow with a snide edge. Also glad that Oak was pissy over the lack of catches.

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(S)ome dumb kids looked at Mewtwo and thought "Hey he can clone things and move objects with his mind and be weak to Ghost attacks, why can't I?" Because it is a freaking game!!! Not something you should actaully practice in real life!!!


Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:08 pm
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i just read this for the first time (my first of your stories also) and i would like to say im throughly intrigued....this is so good im gonna go find your other stories =D

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my normal dragon team....i switch them up a bit sometimes but i like these guys for battles online....
They are a very versatile team...flying ground and some other types as secondary types and dragonite can learn lots of moves..

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Sat May 17, 2008 9:10 am
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no updates in a long while....

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my normal dragon team....i switch them up a bit sometimes but i like these guys for battles online....
They are a very versatile team...flying ground and some other types as secondary types and dragonite can learn lots of moves..

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Mon Jun 09, 2008 1:56 pm
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The classy thing to do would be not to draw attention to it. I'm sure Obs is busy with school and will hopefully update when he can.

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Tue Jun 10, 2008 5:59 am
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