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 Carnival [one-shot] [complete] 
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Pokemon Ranger
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Rated: PG-13 for character death, insanity, and an itsy bit of blood
My Corner: Yes yes I know more death and why haven't I finished that latest chapter for Guessing Game? Well, I'm working on the chapter, and I have so much to do, worry about, and work on I feel like my brain is going to melt out of my head.

Don't worry, I won't abandon it, I don't abandon my stories no matter how many I accumulate thanks to my over active imagination.

Anyways, I'm fairly satisfied with this it even made me feel a little sad...for a minute then I was over it and happy again. XD I hope you enjoy, and while I don't think this is any worse than half the things rated PG-13 out there I apologize if this is beyond PsyPoke's PG-13.Image

<p align="center">Carnival</p>
A woman ran around her house in a panic. She searched each room with fearful red eyes. Her once smooth cheeks were blotchy and her hair was a muss. She was wearing the same clothes as she had been two days ago, a contradiction to what she had been earlier this week, a germ-o-phobic woman. The poor woman had cried so many tears she

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Last edited by Crimson on Fri Oct 20, 2006 12:31 pm, edited 4 times in total.



Thu Oct 19, 2006 5:32 pm
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Pokemon Master
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Nice.

I got to admit, I love your twist at the end. About two/thirds of the way through, I thought she was the one who kept imagining her world was a carnival and not him.

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Thu Oct 19, 2006 6:54 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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<font color="999999"> :shock: :o :cry: :twisted: 8-)

OMFG! what can I say?! this is just AMAZING girl!

I don

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Thu Oct 19, 2006 7:12 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Hee, I'm glad someone, AAMB, noticed that typing error because I didn't. I fixed it. I bet after all the critiquing I do you're all glad I finally made a typo. 8-) I fixed it by the way.

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Fri Oct 20, 2006 12:36 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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<font color="999999"> Not quite so... (Ok, I

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Fri Oct 20, 2006 1:01 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Hee, that feeling's only natural. I'd feel that way too...infact I do...sometimes...*sigh* I wish I felt that way more, you feel all warm and special that you saw someone's mistake when they don't normally do.

By the way, while I'm typing posts...I often times reread it just so I don't make a lot of mistakes so my point is clearly made. So yes, I am indeed human...still don't believe me?

*carves heart out, shows it to you* SEE THAT IS A HUMAN HEART..gurgle *dies [XD]* X_X;

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Sat Oct 21, 2006 7:28 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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<font color="999999">:shock: "OMFGIJUSTSAWAFAKESUICIDEAGAIN!" :shock:

:? ... *tastes ~Crimson~

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Sun Oct 22, 2006 2:25 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Lol, well since I'm a ghost now, I'm just going to have to haunt you and ruin your life AMBy. [yes I came up with a nick name for you]

And you can just call me Crimson. Typing ~Crimson~ everytime can be a pain.

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Sun Oct 22, 2006 4:25 pm
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Ace Trainer
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Great story. I really liked it.

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Fri Oct 27, 2006 5:13 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Omg I think you just made me never want to go to a carnival again. I get scared easily :P I liked it, there was alot of feeling and it really made me feel sad/confused/scared. Good job.

Please excuse my stupididty, but I don't get the ending. Wasn't the man at the carnival her husband? Who was the guy at the carnival and who was the guy in the attic? lol, I'm confused @_@

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Fri Oct 27, 2006 8:14 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Lol, it's alright. Her husband was crazy and imagined he was at a carnival. The part at the carnival actually occured in the attic. The guy from the carnival was her husband and didn't remember her. Since he was crazy it tore at the woman's heart until she couldn't take it any more and killed him.

Quote:

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Sat Oct 28, 2006 9:28 am
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Pokemon Ranger
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<font color="999999">OMG! I didn

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Last edited by AABM on Sat Oct 28, 2006 1:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.



Sat Oct 28, 2006 12:18 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Hee, I thought it was pretty self explanatory since she says he thinks he's at a carnival. And that he was eating cotton candy at the carnival but in real life he at pink insulation which would tear up his throat so he'd cough up blood. *shrugs* who knows.

AAMB is just akward for me to read and type. AMBy is like an actual name that I can refer to you by, I know how it sounds in my head and I don't know how AAMB sounds.

Edit: Lol, it's not. It's just how you're filed in my head. And it's fun to say. am-B...that's how you pronounce it.

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Sat Oct 28, 2006 12:56 pm
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Fails at life
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Loved it.You really make your stories overrated though.I'm 10 and nothing is as bad as you act like it is.I'd say it's PG-11


Mon May 21, 2007 3:35 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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I know, but I try to be a little bit on the 'better safe than sorry' side when it comes to posting my work.

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Wed May 30, 2007 6:19 pm
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It's a good story...you should put more to it!

I know good stories. I read them all the time...

=]=]

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Wed Aug 06, 2008 3:51 pm
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Pokemon Trainer
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Cool Bananas

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Fri Aug 08, 2008 5:28 am
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Ace Trainer
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I felt slightly scared reading this, but the detail was almsot like... I was watching a movie in my head. You're a truly gifted authur, dude... seriously!

But... you scare me. This was weird, and a very gripping story... but weird. Maybe you should calm down there, Steven King.

BUT IT WAS GOOD, that's the point, right? You wrote a good story with dialogue, discription, and the like... weird stuff in it, though. Anyway, congrats, it was good.


Sun Aug 17, 2008 9:19 am
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Anything that good must be illegal.

It was a delicate treat, it didn't drag on, but didn't feel cut short.

To dampen your ego I picked up a few typo's;

"When he stopped her told himself..."
"and kiss his softly, sweetly."

and at the start, is it meant to say muss?
I apologise if so, I haven't heard that before.

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Tue Aug 26, 2008 10:59 am
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Pokemon Ranger
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This is my unedited version, so typos are to be expected. I actually can't stand this story now. <_<;;

Yes, I did mean muss. It's not commonly used, so that may be why you've never heard of it before.

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Tue Aug 26, 2008 12:42 pm
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Ace Trainer
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Crimson wrote:
This is my unedited version, so typos are to be expected. I actually can't stand this story now.


Whatcha workin on now Crimson? Wait, you got one of those library things, right? It should say there...


Wed Aug 27, 2008 5:31 pm
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Pokemon Ranger
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Yes, I do have a library; it's the link in my signature. Mainly PoP and another story that will not be posted on PsyPokes (it's not appropriate for the younger audiences that are on here). I'm also acting as an editor of sorts for a friend of mine (she's returning the favor). I haven't done too many drabbles as of late. Sad to say, I haven't been doing much writing with college now. I've been working on drawing and improving that. Since that's more for school, I had to make that my main priority. Hopefully, I will find a time that'll work to write.

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Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:24 pm
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