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 Blake and Alex: The beginning-Now on chapter 15, please read 
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Ace Trainer
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Sorry about not posting in a while, but I've been caught up with other 'more important' stuff. And, I didn't like the next couple of chapters after this one, so I've been busy editting and rewriting (I even took out three chapters, because they were really stupid and had nothing to do with the actual journey taking place). So, here's the next chapter, and I hope you like it.

Chapter 11
The wrath of Dialga

The Boss stepped forward, murmuring,”So this is the legendary Pokemon, Dialga. Quick, fire the electro net!” The Scientists brought out a buffed up version of the weapon used to capture Aerodactyl, and fired a larger, similar net at Dialga.

Dialga looked up and, quite surprisingly, spoke, saying,”I don’t think so. I will NEVER be captured by incompetent humans such as yourself!” Dialga fired an orb similar to the color of Aerodactyl’s aura, directly into the net. It ripped it open, and continued onward, slamming into the ground at the boss’s feet.

He let out a blood curling scream, but was suddenly cut off by the explosion. The scientists turned, trying to run, but Dialga had other plans. He let loose a Hyper Beam attack, which enveloped them all, killing them instantly. Blake panicked, and returned Sneasel to his Poke Ball.

He also turned to run. His only saving grace was that Dialga was recharging from the Hyper Beam. He pounded down the icy path, making for the exit. Behind him, he heard Dialga let loose a loud roar. Blake had to reach the end of the tunnel. He had to get to Selestia. Only members of her blood line could control Dialga enough to get him to stop his angry rampage.

***

Alex, Blaire, and Selestia had formed a tight ring around the cave entrance, keeping the Grunts from entering. They had together defeated half of them, but they’re pokemon were getting tired.

Alex looked up in time to see an Ekans being released from its Poke Ball. She turned to Houndour, and said,”Use Flamethrower to faint Ekans.” Houndour let loose a powerful blast of fire, which smacked into the Ekans.

Suddenly, a Golbat swooped down and hit Houndour with a Wing Attack. Houndour was instantly fainted by the onslaught. Alex groaned, and returned Houndour to his Poke Ball. She then released Kirlia, her last Pokemon. Her Wartortle had already been fainted.

She pointed at the Golbat, and said,”Go, use Psychic!” Kirlia’s eyes glowed blue, and, suddenly, Golbat plummeted to earth. It hit the ground hard, fainting on contact. The Golbat was returned to its Poke Ball, though Alex didn’t see who’s it was. They were running out of time...

The battle was suddenly stopped, when there came a vicious roar from Ice Cave. Selestia gasped, and said,”Blake was too late. Dialga has been awoken....”

Suddenly, Kirlia used Psychic and drove Alex, Blaire, and Selestia to the ground, making a narrow rescue from the sudden Hyper Beam attack. The next thing they knew, Blake came pounding out of the cave, yelling,”Selestia! Dialga has been awoken, and it killed the Blasto Boss and his scientists! You have to talk to it!”

Selestia nodded, and ran forward, yelling,”Dialga! You must stop this killing right now!”

Dialga slowly emerged from the cafe, saying,”How do I know that you aren’t lying like most humans do? Who are you, any ways?”

Selestia pointed to herself, and said,”I am Selestia, a blood member of the family who protects your cave. This is my brother, Blaire, also a blood member of the family. And these friends of mine, Alex and Blake, are not here to hurt this land.”

Dialga snorted, and replied,”Why was I frozen in the first place?”

Selestia sighed, and said,”Well, you were frozen do to a battle with two legendary Pokemon, Regice and Articuno. The Ice chamber they created cannot be melted, it can only be destroyed with the powerful aura of a certain family of Aerodactyl.”

Dialga stared at Selestia for a second, then sta down, looking up at the sky. He was silent for a second, then spoke. “I remember now. They were taking over land area, and forcing the Pokemon out. I almost won the battle with them, but I still lost. Ah, well. It doesn’t matter now. I am sorry for any trouble I caused. Oh, by the way Blake, I released your Aerodactyl from her cage. But, it has lost the special aura that was used to release me. He was fainted when I opened the cage.” Dialga then noticed the Blasto Grunts behind them, and growled in anger. “They are dressed the same way as those Scientists who attacked me. Hmmm, I know.” Dialga charged up an Ice Beam, and fired it, freezing all the Grunts in their places. “That should hold them. I shall leave now. I have a lot of catching up to do with Palkia, my friend.” Dialga jumped into the sky, a mystical force holding it up.

Blake ran inside, and retrieved Aerodactyl. Aerodactyl was awake when he found her. He ran over and embraced her, and they sat like that for several minutes. He then returned Aerodactyl, finally placing her Poke Ball on her proper place.

He walked back outside, where Blaire was preparing to set off again. He turned to Blake and Alex, and said,”I’d like to thank you personally for your help in this matter. This is for you, Alex...”, he held out a stone that was extremely shiny, colored white. “This is a shiny stone. It evolves certain kinds of Pokemon, though I should let you find out....”

Kirla leaped up, and took the stone from Blaire’s hands. He stared at it curiously, then shrieked as the stone was absorbed right into her skin! Kirlia began to glow, and grew taller. His green legs grew longs, and his arms grew outward, and sword like objects grew from the forearms. When the light dimmed, a new pokemon was left, one Blake had never seen.

Alex pulled out her Pokedex, holding it at her new Pokemon. “Gallade”, the Dex started,” the Blade Pokemon. A master of courtesy and swordsmanship, it fights using extending swords on its elbows.”

Alex smiled, and said,”Well, look at my Kirlia now! It has evolved into a Psychic and Fighting Pokemon!”

Blaire grinned, and said,”Well, that is good news. Now, this is for you, Blake. This egg is supposed to be from a rare Pokemon. I heard that your Aerodactyl came from an egg, so you’ll have experience in raising one.” Blaire handed Blake an egg, which was a dark blue with a stripe of Black in the middle. Blake nodded in thanks, and Blaire released his Pidgeot, jumping on its back. He saluted them, and he flew off into the distance.

Selestia turned back to them, and said,”He’ll send Pokemon Rangers to collect the frozen Grunts. We should head back now. We have a long return journey ahead of us.”

Blake and Alex nodded, and headed off, ready to face new challenges. Alex was ready to defeat Selestia, and Blake knew now that he could beat her. They were both very confident about the upcoming battle.

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Fri Jun 29, 2007 12:06 pm
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*A couple of months later* Right. So, I took a long break. GET OFF MY BACK. Other things you should note is that there's one chapter I wrote a while ago, then I deleted the rest so I could start fresh (imo, after buring my eyes out from reading my old work, I decided there were better two year old writers. So, I get to start again, while putting my new found skills into play.) Actually, you can thank DNA for getting my brain whirring again, so there you go.

One last thing; I am no longer Elemental Trainer. I payed for a name change. As you can see, I am now Ghost Writer. Enjoy the next chapter :D

************************************************************


Chapter 12
‘A clash in the Shadows’

Alex stood across the dark field, staring her opponent, Selestia, right in the eye, waiting for her to explain the rules. Selestia pulled out a Poke Ball, and said,”This shall be a two on two battle. I’ll choose first, then you go. Okay, let’s go Haunter!” She released her ghost Pokemon, who appeared with a grizzly cry.

Alex thought about her pokemon, then pulled out a Poke Ball. “Show me what you can do, Gallade!” Her newly evolved Gallade, giving a cry. “Now, let’s start this battle off nice and strong. Use Psycho Cut!” Gallade sprinted forward, swords fully extended and glowing purple.

Selestia motioned toward Haunter, and said,”Okay, use Sucker Punch!” Haunter stayed where he was, which Alex thought was strange. It had looked like Selestia had ordered an attack, but it looked like Haunter wasn’t doing anything. She was suspicious, but she couldn’t do anything about it, because Gallade was already swinging his swords at Haunter.

At the last possible second, Haunter’s hand reached up and smashed into Gallade, sending him flying back. Alex was astounded. “That was a cheap shot!”, she roared in offense.

Selestia only shook her head, and replied,”That was an attack called Sucker Punch. Your Pokemon waits till the last second, then hits its opponent, before it gets the chance. Pretty neat, huh? Now, Haunter, use Shadow Punch!” Haunter fired a dim outline of one of his hands, which traveled across the field, hitting Gallade while he was still down.

Alex knew the situations was grim. Gallade couldn’t last forever out there, though he looked like he could keep going. Alex couldn’t attack up close because of Shadow Punch, but that was all Gallade could do. She snapped her fingers. She had it! “Go, Gallade, use Teleport to get up close to Haunter!” Gallade suddenly warped forward, till he was right next to Haunter. “Now, use Psycho Cut!” Gallade extended his swords, and struck Haunter with purple glowing blades. Haunter flew back, screaming in agony. Alex knew it had been a critical hit.

Selestia grinned, and said,”A fine strategy, Alex! But, let’s see if you can beat this one! Go, use Hypnosis!” Haunter’s eyes glowed a strange purple, sending a spiraling beam lazily across the field.

Alex had expected this one. “Gallade, dodge with Teleport, then use one last Psycho Cut!” Gallade dodged the Hypnosis attack perfectly, and was warped next to Haunter, and struck once again with his Psycho Cut. Haunter screamed again, only this time more loudly, and hit the ground, fainted.

Selestia scowled, returning Haunter to his Poke Ball. “Good job, my friend. But, are you ready for my next Pokemon? Go, Dusclops!” She released a pokemon with one eye, and a gray and black body. Alex was quick for the Pokedex.

“Dusclops,”the Pokedex stated,” the Beckon Pokemon. Its body is hollow. It is said that those who look into its body are sucked into the void.”

Alex gulped. This sounded like a tough opponent for Gallade. Selestia grinned, then turned to Dusclops. “Dusclops, use Shadow Punch!”, She ordered. Dusclops fired a faint outline of its hand at Gallade.

“Gallade, counter with Teleport,”Alex ordered calmly. Gallade teleported away, just in time. But, as Alex was shocked to see, the Shadow Punch turned around, and followed Gallade as he reappeared. Alex yelled,”Gallade! Watch out!” But the Shadow Punch hit before he could move. He hit the ground, slowly rising to his feet.

Alex scowled. Blake had told her the Shadow Punch was a move that couldn’t miss. “Okay, Gallade. Teleport, then use Night Slash!” Gallade teleported from where he stood, appearing behind Dusclops, the blades on his arms glowing black, much like the shadows surrounding them.

They struck Dusclops in the back, sending it stumbling forward. Alex gasped. It barely had a scratch on it! Selestia chuckled, and said,”Now, Dusclops, hide in the shadows!”

Dusclops disappeared into the shadows. Gallade stayed where he was, head rotating back and forth, frantically trying to locate the missing ghost pokemon.

Alex frowned. This was bad news. If she didn’t find Dusclops, Gallade wouldn’t last much longer...

Selestia pointed at Gallade, and said,”Now, Dusclops! Use Shadow Ball!” Out of the shadows, a ball of shadow energy came forth, smashing into Gallade. There was a small explosion, and Gallade lay on the ground, fainted.

Alex returned Gallade to his Poke Ball. She didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t beat Selestia if she used the shadows for cover. “Darkness”, she said under her breath,”that’s it!” She pulled out a Poke Ball, and released Houndour. “Houndour!”,She called,”Use Odor Sleuth to find Dusclops!” Houndour closed his eyes, sniffing the air. He turned around, and growled in triumph as he located Dusclops. “Good!,”Alex encouraged,”Now, use Flamethrower!” Houndour opened his jaws, and fired a bright stream of fire into the shadows, illuminating them just enough for Alex to see Dusclops become enveloped by the flames.

Selestia scowled, and said,”Go, Dusclops, get out of there with Shadow Sneak!” Dusclops warped through the shadows, appearing behind Houndour, and striking him in the back.

Houndour stumbled forward, then quickly turned around. Alex grinned, and said,”Good job! Now, use Dark Pulse!”

From the stands, there came a gasp. Blake stood up, not quite believing his ears. He hadn’t known that Houndour had learned Dark Pulse. This would definitely change the pace of the battle.

Houndour dug deep inside himself, and fired a dark blast of energy, which hit Dusclops at close range. A small explosion enveloped Dusclops. When the smoke cleared, it was apparent that it was fainted.

Selestia sighed, and returned Dusclops to its Poke Ball. She walked across the field, and dug into her jacket pocket. Her hand emerged, holding a silver badge that showed a beautiful setting sun. She offered it to Alex, saying,”In recognition of my defeat, I present you with the official Shadow City gym badge, the Twilight badge!”

Alex took it, an awed expression on her face. “Th-th-thank you,”she stuttered, unable to believe that she had just defeated Selestia. She placed the badge carefully in her pocket, then motioned to Blake, saying,”Its your turn, now. I know you can do it this time!”

Blake nodded, and descended the stands, taking Alex’s spot on the field. Selestia grinned, and said,”Like my battle with Alex, this will be a two on two battle. I’ll choose first. Okay, go Banette!” She released a pokemon that was smile in size, but had a big, toothy grin.

Blake pulled out his Pokedex. “Banette,”the Dex stated,” the Marionette Pokemon. Strong feelings of hatred turned a puppet into a Pokemon. If it opens its mouth, its cursed energy escapes.”

Blake thought about his Pokemon, then decided to go with Aerodactyl again. He released his Pokemon, who appeared with a screeching cry. The opponents faced each other, the tension building in the air. Blake attacked first. “Now, Aerodactyl! Use Aerial Ace!” Aerodactyl smashed into Banette like a shot fired from a gun. Banette tumbled back, dazed from the sudden attack. “Keep going!”, Blake urged,” Use that Flamethrower I taught you!” Aerodactyl took a deep breath, and blew out a stream of flames, which enveloped Banette.

Selestia gasped. She hadn’t expecting such a strong start. She narrowed her eyes, and said,”Now, Banette! Use Shadow Ball to extinguish the flames!” Banette fired the ball of shadow energy, which pushed the flames back. The two attacks caused an explosion, so large it shook the field. The smoke cleared, revealing the two opponents in a stand off.

Blake tensed, then yelled,”Use Dragonbreath!” Aerodactyl fired green colored flames at Banette.

Selestia scowled, and said,”Okay, Banette! Use Shadow Ball again!”

This is what Blake had been waiting for. “Aerodactyl! Use Iron head!” As the Dragonbreath and the Shadow Ball collided, Aerodactyl flew around them, head tucked in. She smashed into Banette, sending it toppling away. Behind Aerodactyl, the Shadow Ball and Dragonbreath exploded, sending up a shower of dirt. Banette lay on the ground, one hundred percent knocked out.

Blake punched the air triumphantly, watching Selestia return Banette to its Poke Ball. She pulled out a new one, saying,”You’ve done well, Blake. But can you beat this one?” With that, she threw her Poke Ball, releasing a strange Pokemon that looked like a balloon.

Blake wondered where such a strange looking Pokemon came from, and pulled out his Pokedex. “Drifblim”, the Dex started,” the Blimp Pokemon. Its the evolved form of Drifloon. It’s drowsy in daytime, but flies off in the evening in big groups. No one knows where they go.”

Blake thought this was the most bizarre Pokemon he had ever heard off. It didn’t matter, though. It could still be dangerous. He turned to Aerodactyl, saying,”Let’s end this quickly. Use Rock Slide!” Aerodactyl flew toward the ground, picking up a good sized piece of earth. She flew over Drifblim, releasing it.

Selestia chuckled, and said,”Now, use Psychic to stop the Rock Slide!” The eyes of Drifblim glowed purple, and the Rock Slide stopped in midair. The rocks were thrown aside, leaving Drifblim undamaged. Selestia chuckled, and said,”Now, use Shadow Ball!”

Drifblim fired a ball of shadow energy, which smashed into Aerodactyl. Selestia chuckled, and said,”Now, use Shock Wave!” Drifblim fired an electrical wave, which traveled quickly toward Aerodactyl, striking her.

Aerodactyl screamed, and hit the ground. Blake yelled in surprise, and cried,”Come on, Aerodactyl! We’ve come too far for it to end here!” Aerodactyl stirred, and rose to her feet, though she was very wobbly. She took to the skies, flapping her wings slowly. Blake was proud of Aerodactyl. He thought it was over with the Shock Wave attack. “’Now, Aerodactyl! Use Stone Edge!” Aerodactyl sprang forward, traveling toward Drifblim with increasing speed.

Selestia chuckled, and said,”Good try, but I can stop even this. Use Ominous Wind, Drifblim.” Drifblim’s eyes glowed purple, and a wind was summoned, blowing toward Aerodactyl. Aerodactyl’s attack slowed, until she finally fully stopped, and was flung backward, striking the wall and fainting.

Blake was shocked by this display of power, returning Aerodactyl to her Poke Ball. Blake frowned, thinking about the typage of Drifblim. He grinned, and released Flaafy.

Selestia nodded, and said,”Good. You figured out the Drifblim is not only a ghost Pokemon, but also a flying Pokemon.”

Blake grinned, and turned to Flaafy, saying,”Okay, let’s try a Thunderbolt!” Flaafy fired a bolt of electricity, which struck Drifblim. Blake punched the air. A direct hit.

Selestia frowned, and said,”Drifblim, use Shadow Ball.”

Drifblim fired a ball of shadow energy. Blake scowled, and yelled,”Flaafy, jump and dodge. Then, use Zap Cannon!” Flaafy took a tremendous leap, clearing the Shadow Ball. He then fired an electrical ball of energy, which struck Drifblim right between the eyes. Drifbloom flew back, striking the wall, fainted. Selestia grinned, returning Drifblim to its Poke Ball.

She walked forward, pulling out a silvery badge. “As I told Alex, I present you with the Twilight badge, the official badge of the Shadow City Gym!” Blake took it, nodding in thanks.

Alex ran toward Blake, letting out a whoop. She hugged him, saying,”See? I told you that you could do it. You just have to believe in your Pokemon.” Blake returned the hug shyly, not quite sure what to do in this situation.

Selestia laughed, and said,”You should leave tomorrow morning, then continue on to Port Hosten. There’s a road that leads to the East, which will take you to the next Gym. There, you should battle for your next badge. I hope to see you again, Blake. It was good having you around again.”

Blake nodded, and said,”Don’t worry, Selestia. I’ll come back, maybe when I’ve collected all the badges I’ll return and do some training. Oh, tell Blaire that I’ll take good care of the egg. I can’t wait to see what it holds!” Blake laughed, then turned toward the door, happy that he had finally beaten the third gym, and was ready to move on to the next.

***

Blake and Alex stepped onto the road, ready to leave Shadow City. Behind them, Selestia was waving good bye. Blake grinned. Even though he would be leaving Shadow City again, he knew it wasn’t forever. He was going to see his friends again. Until then, he would keep moving on, not letting the past get to him ever again.



Again, I'm going to ask you to remember that I wrote this long ago. So, expect the next chapter to be a little bit different.

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Thu Aug 23, 2007 8:09 pm
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Since NOBODY is going to post (though my views did go up by a lot) I'm going to post the new chapter. I spell checked it, and read through it once or twice (though I wasn't really paying attention.) So, here we go. The next chapter. I'm hoping to take a different out look on this story, as you'll probably see.

Chapter 13
P.R.A

“Where are we headed next?”, Alex asked for the sixth time that day. She and Blake were closing in on Hasten City. They were about twenty minutes away, and Blake couldn’t get Alex to shut up. She hadn’t stopped talking since they left Shadow City, and he was considering ditching her in the cramped streets of Hasten.

Blake gave a deep sigh. He knew he wouldn’t do it. Even though he had only known Alex for a couple of weeks, they had been through more hardships and dangers than most friends didn’t endure in a life time. Some things just made people like each other. But, he still couldn’t drown out Alex’s voice. She had the kind that you can’t ignore, and it just burrows into your brain till it echoes through your head.

For the sixth time that day, Blake launched into his explanation of why they were back tracking through to Spring Town. “We have to back track to Spring Town, so we can take the eastern road, which leads to Waythrough city, which winds all the way around the Misty Forests. See, there’s a huge forest between Port Glosnen and the Waythrough city. And, since a bunch of activists are screaming about how we’re destroying our natural landscapes, there’s no road through it. I would consider hiking through it, but it’s pretty dense, and you can get lost in it quite easily. So, we’re going to play it safe and go around. It’ll tack another week and a half to our schedule, but...”

“Blake, do you see that?”, Alex interrupted. Blake glanced at Alex in annoyance, but saw the fear etched clearly on her soft face. He followed her gaze, and stopped dead in his tracks.

They had been rising up a hill, and they now stood at the top. Looking down, they could perfectly see Hasten City. Except, it wasn’t the same as the last time they saw it. Smoke rose into the sky, leading down to a mass of rubble. Hasten City had been completely destroyed.

They stared down at the ruins of the City for what seemed like hours. FInally, tugging at Alex’s arm, Blake led the way down the hill.

***

Walking down the shattered remains of a street, Alex looked anxiously around for some sign of life. As they passed the bombed out remains of a large building, horror slowly sank into her body. Who could’ve done this? Blasto?

She voiced her thoughts to Blake, who shook his head, his white face gleaming in the slowly fading light. “No, almost all of Blasto was captured, remember? And their boss is dead.... No. This is something much more powerful. And less merciful.”

They walked down the street, still looking for anyone who had survived this massacre. Suddenly, Alex cried out, pointing at what looked like a bunch of dirty rags on the ground. Only, these rags seemed to be stirring and calling for help.

As Blake approached them, he noticed that they weren’t a bunch of rags, but in fact a man who had been gravely injured. His clothes were ripped and torn, and there were places where they were stained red with blood. Blake rolled him over, discovering a large and bloody hole in his stomach area.

The man, who’s eyes were strangely dazed, reached out and grabbed Alex’s arm, who had been hovering over his head. He moaned for water, and Blake took off his bag, searching for his canteen. He opened it, and dribbled some water into the injured man’s open mouth, which was missing a few teeth.

As the man gratefully lapped up water, Blake asked,” What happened here?”

The man coughed, spraying blood, and explained, in a wheezing voice that sounded like he wasn’t getting enough air, the story of the assault on Hasten City. “It was midnight when they came,” he began,” I was coming off duty, I’m a police officer, you know. Well, we heard this strange sound coming from the river. A boat pulled in, and a local fisherman jumped out, shouting something about the local group of Gyarados were heading straight for the city. And they were mad, real mad. He was about to tell us more, when a Hyper Beam shot out of the dark, and enveloped him.” The man paused, gulping in air, and said,” He was killed instantly. I wonder if he felt any pain in his death, like I am now....” His eyes unfocused for a second. Alex squeezed his hand, and they refocused on Blake, and he continued,” Any ways, we sent a runner back to the police station. The rest of us began getting into our boats, releasing our water Pokemon. In all our years working here, my Vaporeon and I have never seen anything like this.” He stopped, his eyes whelling up with tears.

He took another wheezing breath, and Blake noticed that his voice was becoming weaker, his eyes becoming foggier. Nevertheless, he continued on, saying,” Any ways, we move right towards a group of about forty some odd Gyarados. It was then, when we could see them clearly, I noticed that each one had one or two humans riding them, flags in their hands. The symbols upon them looked like that one over there.” He pointed to a half crumbled wall, where somebody had scratched a symbol on it. It showed two circles overlapping each other, with an upside down five point star inside the overlap.

The man continued on, his breath becoming labored. “I’ve seen it before, I just can’t place it. Any ways, we’re heading right at them. Our plan was to try and scare off the group, but we realized too late these Gyarados were not wild. They began firing Hyper Beams at us. The one upfront bore a large, bald headed man. His Gyarados was red. It fired it’s Hyper Beam at me. I thought I was dead.” He wheezed for a second, then started crying uncontrollably. “Vap-Vap-Vaporeon jumped in front of me! It took the Hyper beam, sacrificing himself to keep me alive. Now look at me. His sacrifice was in vain....”

The man paused for a second, controlling his tears, then said,” Well, I don’t know how I ended up back on solid ground. I guess that the Hyper Beams had sent up giant waves, and one had carried me to shore. Any ways, I could see from where I was that our defensive attack had not been successful. The few remaining boats were returning to shore, where we would defend the city till it was evacuated. It was still all in vain.”

The man laughed, and said,” They cracked us open like an egg. They came onto land, the Gyarados slithering like giant sea serpents. They were blowing up buildings, and they were kidnapping trainers and children. Their main objective was the Pokemon Center. I saw several of the mysterious riders coming out of the PC, loads of Poke Balls in their arms. I can only guess what they wanted with them.”

Once again, the man stopped, his voice now almost a whisper. He looked into Blake’s eyes, and said,” I saw them. I saw them taker her! Her! My daughter, Isabella! Please, please, I beg you. Save her for me. Please...” he stopped talking; he gave one final, deep breath, then let it out, and more than air seemed to escape his lips. He laid there, still, his eyes gazing unblinkingly up into the sky. He was dead.

Alex sobbed as Blake reached forward, closing the dead man’s eyes out of respect. He guessed that the man had tried to stop them from taking his daughter, and met the opposite end of a Hyper Beam.

Blake looked up sharply, hearing the approaching sound of footsteps from behind the wall that bore the strange symbol. Blake suddenly tensed, realizing that perhaps the attackers were still in the city. Blake heaved a relieved sigh as a familiar face stuck his head around the destroyed wall; Blake placed the pudgy face, short, curly hair, thick set eye brows, and bright green eyes with the younger brother of the local gym leaders.

“Maxie!” cried Alex, who was still holding the deceased man’s hand. “We were worried that there was nobody still alive!”

Maxie’s usually happy, boyish face was very grave. Blake noticed, with horror, that there was a very large cut running from his right eyebrow down his face. Maxie looked down at the man, and sighed, saying,” I’m going around, looking for the wounded.”

Blake stood up, and asked,” Where are your brothers?”

Maxie cast a weary eye around them, as if he was searching for anymore attackers. “We set up a command center and a hospital. Larry is helping out there, and Samuel, he-he”. Larry broke out into an uncontrollable sob, and stuttered out,” He’s in the hospital! He lost his leg in the attack. We were defending the city, and this Gyarados came out of nowhere. Samuel barely got out of the way. His leg was torn off by the attack, though.”

Alex got up, walked over to Maxie, and hugged him. Slowly, his cries slowed down, till they came to a complete stop. “Maxie”, Blake began,” do you know who’s symbol that is?” He was pointing at the one on the wall.

Eyeing it with loathing, Maxie spat out,” It’s Pra.” He glanced at their confused faces, and said,” P.R.A. Pokemon Rights Activists. They don’t agree with trainers capturing them in Poke Balls, and using them in battle. A month ago, Pra’s original leader died, and they vanished. A week later, trainers began disappearing, showing up later dead, their Pokemon gone. The Yesto League has been trying to keep it under wraps, but now we know we can’t. Now we know Pra is behind it all. They’ve become enemy number one. They’re such a threat, we’ve called The meeting of the twelve.” Again, he was met with confused faces. Maxie sighed, and said,” The meeting of the twelve is a meeting between all eight gym leaders of Yesto, and then the four Elite 4 members. The champion may even attend.”

Blake nodded. Excitement pulsed through him, and said,” Maxie, could we listen in on the meeting?”

Maxie frowned, and said,” Normally no trainer is allowed. But.... since you did help eliminate the Blasto threat, there may be an acception. Like me. I’m allowed because my brother’s are gym leaders. And, since my brother i-is in no way ca-ca-capable of walking, the meeting will take place in his room.” Understandably, Maxie stumbled over the part of his brother’s missing leg.

Alex yawned, and said,” Listen, Maxie. I’m tired. Do you think you could lead the way to your command center?”

Blake was staring at the symbol intently, not catching Maxie agreeing. The symbol looked familiar. And then a new wave of fear swam over him. His brother might’ve been in town when it happened! Even though his dislike for him had grown, Blake couldn’t run away from the simple fact anymore; the truth was, he loved his brother.

Voicing his fears to Maxie, he simply shrugged and said,” Not much we can do about it. We’ve compiled a list of missing trainers who had booked rooms at the Pokemon Center. We’ll check that as soon as we get back to base.”

Maxie then took off, with Alex and Blake in tow. Blake had an icy hand of fear clenched around his stomach. This new enemy was sure to bring danger to all trainers. But, then again, he would be seeing more familiar faces soon enough. Blake trotted after Maxie, praying that this new danger wouldn’t consume them all.

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Fri Aug 24, 2007 2:41 pm
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Yes, you read right. There is indeed a new chapter, which I somehow managed to write under a constant bombardment of AP homework. So, enjoy. Keep in mind that I didn't really get a chance to proofread. All I did was spell check it.

I also give partial credit to some of the Gym Leader's names to my brother, who I go to everytime I'm having trouble finding a suitable name. Most of them are Lating for some odd reason, though.

Also, please post anything that isn't SPAM. This includes:Good rates, bad rates, medium rates, lowly rates, hater raters, lover raters, random tid bits of "Drop this story it sucks!!!1!1111!!, and the ever so lovely "This story deserves to die. It sucks. You suck" comments.



Eight and Four

As a fiery glow appeared on the horizon, the thick fog covering Hosten City began to thin. Standing on top of a three story building’s roof, Blake gazed at the sky, eyes searching. A flicker caught his eyes, but it was only a lone Pidgeotto, which was circling the ruins, searching for prey. Blake mildly considered calling out his Aerodactyl, directing it at the Pokemon, and capturing it. Maybe a day in the past, Blake thought.

He returned his eyes to the sky, still looking for a sign of approaching Pokemon, people on mounted on their backs. It had been three days since the message had gone out, calling for the eight gym leaders and four Elite Four members of Yesto to meet in Hosten, the site of a devastating attack.

Somebody was scrambling up the fire escape. Blake ignored them. Probably Maxie. Or Alex. Blake grimaced as he remembered the past few days. He had rushed into the temporary command center, flipping through a list of missing trainers that had checked in to the Pokemon Center, seeing Tyler’s name among them, fear ripping through him....

It didn’t compare to the shock of seeing Samuel and Larry. Samuel, who was occupying a room at a hospital, had been seriously maimed in the attack, his left leg torn off by a Hyper Beam.

And then Larry, who’s right arm was in a sling, major nerve damage making it barely useful. And that eye patch.... Blake shuddered. Larry’s eye had been damaged in the attack, and had to be surgically removed. They were just kids, yet they would bare these injuries for the rest of their lives.

Somebody tapped Blake on the back, disturbing his thoughts. He turned around; it was just Alex. She didn’t say anything, but pointed at the sky.

Blake whirled around. He saw a dark shape appear, rendurred barely visible by the fiery red-orange globe that was the rising sun. As it came closer, Blake saw it was in fact a massive Pokemon with a red body, two leathery wings, and a tip ignited in flames; a Charizard. There were three people mounting it. It began to circle the city, looking for a place to land.

An oddly familiar voice sounded in his ear, saying,” That Charizard belongs to the leader of Waythrough town, Laverna. She helped me become a leader, you know.”

Blake whirled around, coming nose to nose with John, the Psychic gym leader from Springtown! As Blake stumbled back, John chuckled. Blake recovered, and stuttered out,” H-how did you DO that?”

John motioned down at his side, which is when Blake noticed the young man’s strongest Pokemon; his Kadabra. John’s hand rested lightly on his back. “Teleported”, the young man said simply.

Blake looked back at the sky, catching the Charizard begin it’s descent. “Who else is with her?”, he asked.

John yawned, and said,” Well, right behind Laverna is Emil. He’s a bug type gym leader.”

The Charizard suddenly dived, and Blake caught a look of a man around John’s age, sporting a slick blonde cut. He had mahogany brown skin, and similar colored eyes. In front of him was a woman, also John’s age (Blake was beginning to realize how young the Yesto Leaders were) with pale hair, and fare face, and piercing blue eyes.

Blake saw the final passenger before the Charizard landed, a boy who was a few years older than Blake, who had brown, spiky hair like his, a rough, pale face, and green eyes.

John followed Blake’s eyes, and answered the question floating in his mind. Rather darkly, John said,” That’s Joseph. He’s brand new, but damn powerful. He specializes in poison types.”

“Brand new?”, Alex asked,” What happened to the old Gym Leader?”

“Brutally murdered by a group of thugs”, John replied. His face grew darker, and he said, in a low voice,” Some people think that Joseph was behind it. His brother is in the gang that were hired to kill him. I dunno, but I just don’t trust that guy. He’s always skulking around, and he looks like he has something to hide.”

Blake was about to ask another question, when he saw something colorful dart overhead. He pointed at it, recognizing it’s two passengers, and cried,” Hey, it’s Blare and Selestia!”

John nodded, then pointed at the sky, and said,” That’s not it. It looks like the seventh gym leader is quickly approaching.”

Blake looked, and saw something silvery flash across the sky, reflecting the sun. “Steel gym leader?”, Blake asked, recognizing the Pokemon, the steel/flying type Skarmory.”

John scoffed, and said,” Not exactly. Ventus is a flying type gym leader, the leader of Vaolatilis Town.” The Skarmory came into view, and Blake noticed a petite girl perched on top, her light brown flyaway hair whipping in the wind. Blake was surprised to see her eyes were a milky white color. John noticed his surprise, and said, quite sadly,” No, your eyes do not deceive you. Ventus is blind.”

“How does she battle?”, Alex asked, looking a little uncomfortable as the Skarmory took its rider down to the command center.

John grinned mischievously, and said,” You’ll soon find out. Oh, look at the river! That’s a rare site even for me!”

Blake glanced down, and saw a huge yacht pulling up to the rubble strewn beach. It dropped its anchor, and four people jumped out. Blake couldn’t see who they were, but again John spoke, pointing at the sky again. “That’s the last one; Tarpelus, the leader of Silicis City. He’s a big fan of the rock types!”

Blake glanced up, and was unable to believe his eyes. A huge gray Pokemon, it’s large, leathery wings stretched wide, soared across the river. Blake missed the rider; he was too busy reveling at the size an Aerodactyl grew to! He thought of his own; it was puny compared to this behemoth.

John prodded Blake in the back, and said,” That’s all of them. You both have been invited to the meeting, but don’t get too excited. They’re usually quite dull, with lots of politics. My first one nearly forced me to quit from sheer boredom.”

As Blake turned, Alex asked,” What was the meeting about?”

John returned his Kadabra to its Poke Ball. Swinging one leg over the side, he said,” It was the day that Team Blasto had become a real danger; they robbed a bank and hurt several innocents; killed a woman, too.” He climbed down the ladder, which groaned in protest. John ignored it, and said,” We didn’t do anything till then. And even then, all we did was start covering Blasto’s tracks, trying to pass the robbery off as a few common criminals.”

With an echoing thud, John landed on the fire escape, and continued his story, saying,” Well, I guess I lied. It wasn’t just boredom that almost made me resign. Come on, you two. We should receive the other eleven leaders.”

Blake scrambled down the fire escape, finally letting a tiny thread of hope expand into a ray of light. Maybe these leaders could help him. Finally, Blake was doing what he was best at; acting instead of thinking.

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Thu Sep 06, 2007 7:15 pm
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Hiya heres some stuff i found in your chapters (well my spell checker found them really :oops: )

Chapter 10:

You spell travelling with one L
You spell Marvelling with one L
There are a hell of a lot of missed spaces*
You spell Somersaulted wrong
And (unless your American) spell Coloured wrong

Chapter 11:

You spell signalled with one L
(not important) but you spell Woah when it says it should be Whoa
(not important) but apparently Stalky isn't a word
Again a lot of missed spaces*

Chapter 12: (BRAVO WITH THIS ONE BY THE WAY)

I don't know if this is deliberate but you say it is Chapter 11
Again missed spaces*
(I say bravo because they are the only mistakes!!!)

Chapter 13:

Again chapter number mix up
You spell Flaaffy as Flaafy
You spell Spiralling wrong
You say Drifbloom instead of Drifblim
Missed spaces*
You spell travelling with one L

Chapter 14:

(not important) It says that pudgy isn't a word
Missed Spaces*
(not important) Whelling is apparently spelt welling but i dont mind that
Labouring is spelt wrong, without the U
(not important) Finally was spelt like this FInally

Chapter 15:

Missed spaces*
Rendered is spelt wrong
Colourful is spelt wrong (unless your American)


*Missed Space is my way of saying that you missed the sapce in between the speech and i finished comment.

Instead of "The dog is dead" ,Blake said.
It should read "The dog is dead", Blake said.


Anyway i hope you enjoy the rest of your career and your new story (i noticed:) ) PLease don't take these comments bad i'm only trying to help you improve...


Fri Sep 07, 2007 12:19 pm
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Wow. Apparently, my spell check is screwed up, because that's how I spelt most of those words. But, they came up as wrong in the spell check. Ugh. More wasted time fixing the mistakes of macintosh....

Oh, and I am American, and it's colorful, colored, and such.

Anyways, now that it's the weekend, expect me to work on my story more (Though one of my teachers (coughcensoredwordcoughcough) took notice and gave me a large project DUE NEXT CLASS PERIOD *#( &@(#$.

Oh, and back to Dragon Champion....

Chapter twelve says chapter eleven because it originally was part of chapter eleven. But, it was so long, I split it in half so it wouldn't make the readers' eyes fall out. I must've forgotten to change it.

Um, maybe it's the language barrier, but I don't remember writing Blake saying "The dog is dead", but I'll check....

Thanks for the review! I encourage everybody else to take a page out of Dragon Champion's book, because he is very good at rating. Thx! *starts writing next chapter*

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Fri Sep 07, 2007 2:34 pm
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Okay, here's another chapter. Hopefully, you'll see the direction I'm going, and hopefully won't show up on my door step with flaming torches and what not. Um, comments please. I wish I had readers who were committed to reading my chapters and actually letting me know they at least liked it (while of course posting constructive critisism)

Also, I'm working on character profiles so the readers will know more about the sudden growth in important characters, and about their past and such.

Any grammar or spelling mistakes should be blamed on my stupid spell checker.


Chapter 15
Champion’s Grief

Blake paced his room, trying to keep calm. But the truth was, he was bored out of his mind. Even after all eight leaders and all four Elite four members had arrived, the Elite four had insisted on waiting for the champion. Of course, that had been two days ago. So, they finally decided to hold the meeting at ten o’clock tonight. Only an hour left.

Finally laying down on his bed, Blake stared up at the ceiling, thinking about Tyler. Wonder where he is. Blake shifted to a more comfortable position, and closed his eyes, wondering if Tyler was still alive, or if he would show up dead, like other trainers that had gone missing....

Blake found himself in a small, dirty jail cell. He was laying down on a rough bed like pedestal, the cool stone cooling his skin, which was covered with angry red welts. He hurt all over.

He absently glanced down at his dirty prison uniform, which was filled with holes, the pants and shirt rolled up. The cell was stifling hot. Foot steps were echoing off of the walls, and a huge man, obscured by the shadows, appeared at the barred door. Blake heard an audible click, and the door swung open.

“Time to work, slave”, the man said, his sly voice echoing off the walls. Blake ignored him. The man made a hand motion, and a guard pushed past him. Blake glanced up, and took a stick to the face. His nose crunched, blood leaking from it like a faucet. But still, Blake refused to get up. Another hit from the stick, this time on his stomach, and another flash of pain. This time, though, he toppled off his “bed”, sprawling across the floor.

“Come on, don’t you want to see your brother again?” The voice sounded tantalizing, like a snake about to strike its pray.

Blake moaned, and glanced up. “What do you care about him?”

The man walked forward, out of the shadows. His bald head glinted in the artificial light. His eyes, black and cold, seemed hungry. He folded his arms, huge muscles contracting under the too small shirt. “Well, he does seem about to fall apart because of your disappearance. Why, our spy within the Yesto League reports he’s distraught over your kidnapping. Wouldn’t it be unfortunate if he woke up to learn that his dear Tyler’s body was found during the night, brutally tortured to death?” As he finished, the man took a bat out from behind him, and swung it at Blake’s head. Blake tensed for the blow....

Blake jerked awake, crying out Tyler’s name. Breathing heavily, he blinked sweat out of his eyes, looking around his dark room. Next to him stood Alex, who had jumped back when Blake awoke.

“Yes?”, Blake asked, still shaking.

Alex gave him a worried look, and said,” Listen, the meeting’s about to start, but you’re obviously sick. You were tossing and turning when I came in, and sweating up a river. Why don’t you stay in here, and I’ll go alone. I’ll be all right.”

But Blake was already out of bed, stretching. Rubbing the back of his head, he remembered the vivid dream. That was some nightmare... Blake made a decision. “Don’t worry about me, Alex. It was just a dream. Let’s go; we’re going to be late.”

*******************

A few minutes later, Blake and Alex found themselves sitting in Samuel’s room, alone except for the young boy, who was snoozing quietly.

Blake glanced at his watch. The meeting was set to start in three minutes. The door burst open, and a rabble of people walked in; John, Laverna, Blaire, and Selestia. She grinned, giving Blake an encouraging look. Blake somewhat grudgingly nodded back to her greeting. She had heard about Tyler, and insisted on trying to act like his mom, which resulted in Blake growing weary of her.

John gave a boyish grin, and walked over to them, followed closely by Laverna. Pulling up a chair, he plopped down, looking over at Samuel, who had by now awakened. He yawned, stretching his arms, and gave John a happy look. “John, how’ve you been?”

John just smiled back, but had lost his humorous look when Samuel shifted, the stub of his leg imprinted under the sheets. Nervously, he turned to Blake, and motioned to Laverna, and introduced her. “This is Laverna. As I’ve said, she helped me become a Gym Leader by training me to take on the old one.”

She nodded at them, and said, in a somewhat playful voice,” Yeah, though John still hasn’t learned how to win properly.”

John chuckled, and perked up as the door opened again, but instantly soured. In walked Joseph, who looked just as seedy as John had described up close. His greasy hair was combed back, dark rings around his eyes standing out from his pale face. He gave them a curt nod, and sat down in a chair, positioning it to face the crowd, like he expected one of them to put a knife in his back.

Before the door closed, though, it opened again, revealing Larry, Maxie, Emil, and the milky eyed Ventus. Blake was surprised to see her walk so confidantly without some sort of Guide Pokemon, but she glided gracefully into the room, then walked straight towards John. “Greetings”, she said, her voice flowing like water over smooth rock.

“How can you move like that”, Blake blurted out, Alex giving him a disapproving glare.

Ventus smiled, and said,” I have the gift of seeing the Aura. While I can’t see the physical world, I can see the mystical energy in it. It is a rare gift that I am honored to have.”

While Maxie and Larry came to sit cross legged on Samuel’s bed, chittering like a pack of chipmunks, Emil pulled a chair up next to Joseph, and started talking quietly to him. John scowled at them, but didn’t say anything.

And then the door opened again, and in trooped the four Elites. Blake didn’t know any of them, but he was surprised to see they were each a mirror image of the other. He voiced this to John, who ******. “They’re quadruplets, these four. And all four of them are pretty strong.”

Blake glanced at one of them, his plain brown, curly hair, thin eyebrows, and brown eyes glancing amusedly around the room, when the door opened for the second to last time.

In walked a tall man, with wiry arms, slick blond hair, a picture perfect face, and bright green eyes. He seemed to radiate rock solid nerves, cool confidence, and an aura of respect. The eighth and most powerful Gym Leader, Tarpelus.

One of the Elite four members stood up, and said,” Let us begin the meeting. First of all, I would like everyone to note that the champion will be joining us tonight. Unfortunately he has been held up by some business at Star Island.”

Blake leaned over to John, and murmured into his ear, asking about Star Island. “It’s the base of the Elite Four, the Champion, and where the Yesto tournament is held.”, John hissed back.

The quadruplet continued, saying,” Also, I would like the Gym Leaders to note we have some guests tonight. Most of you know Maxie, who’s the younger brother of the Gym Leader tag team here in Hosten. Also, we have Blaire, who is an outstanding member of the Pokemon Ranger enforcing squad, and the older brother to Selestia, the Gym Leader up at Shadow City. And then we have Blake and Alex.”

Blake felt his face burn as curious eyes turned toward him. He gave a half hearted wave, and proceeded to stare at the ground. But the Elite took no notice, and kept on talking, saying,” They helped deal a big blow to the criminal organization called Team Blasto, and also helped avert a crisis with the legendary Pokemon, Dialga. And I would also like the Leader’s to note his father is Fr-”

The door burst open, and in walked a happy young man, his hair the color of straw, a thin face, and a compacted, but muscular build. He had a black cape draped around his shoulders. John leaned back, and murmured to Blake,”That’s the current Champion. He goes by Wolf, though his real name is William.”

Blake could see why he was called wolf. He certainly had a wild look about him. Wolf gave the occupants a stern look, and said,” I apologize for my late entrance, but there were a few matters that required my presence. I actually thought it would be exciting; but it was just a bunch of silly politicians squabbling over inter region treaties again.”

Still standing, his eyes fell on Blake, and he said, somewhat gloomily,” You must be Blake Rider.”

Blake nodded. Wolf sighed, and said,” And I presume your father is the Pokemon Trainer named Frank Rider?” A whisper suddenly traveled across the room, and excitement filled the eyes that turned toward Blake, who was nodding.

Wolf sighed, and said,” Then it will grieve you to know he was found dead.”

Blake felt like somebody had socked him in the stomach. Blake gasped, and said, rather shakily,” Where? How? How do you know this?”

Wolf sat in a vacant chair, his eyes full of understanding. “He was found near Sprout Town. It looked like he was trying to get back to your mother.” Wolf shifted, and said, softly,” He showed signs of torture. His Pokemon were gone, too. Much like other trainers that have been found dead. He must’ve escaped his captures, and fled, trying to get home. But, he was caught just short of his destination. Your Mother has already buried him. She tried to contact you, but couldn’t, seeing how the Pokemon Center here was destroyed.”

Suddenly, the weight of the world seemed to press Blake from all sides. First Tyler being taken, and now his Father being dead. Blake thought back to the message his father had left in the caves of Mount Glaceon. Blake knew what to do now; he had to find Tyler. If not for him, or for his Mother, then for Blake’s Father’s memory. To honor him.

The Champion stared at him, and said, the the whole room,” We are here to discuss what action must be taken against the organization Pra, who may’ve killed Frank Rider, ex champion of the Yesto Region.”

John raised his hand, and said,” Well, seeing as they’ve brutally murdered hundreds of people, kidnapped trainers, stolen Pokemon, and nearly wiped an entire city off the map, I would say we should give it all back double.”

Emil scowled at John, and said,” Always so quick to violence, are we John? Or are you still bitter from last meeting?”

Laverna instantly jumped to his defence, saying,” Go kiss a Grimer, Emil. You know we made the wrong decision last time. If it wasn’t for Blake, Alex, Blaire, and Selestia, then Dialga may’ve caused major damage, and killed innocent people. John is right; this is a force that shouldn’t be taken so lightly.”

This led to Emil making an angry retort, and soon enough, a large argument broke out. Blake ignored all of this; the news of his father’s death had still shocked him. And then Ventus said something, her smooth voice quieting the group. “If you all are done going for each other’s throats, I would like to say something.” The crowd glanced at the petite woman, who continued,” You’ve all seen the physical damaged done. But none of you have experienced first hand the evil caused by this group. Except for four people here.” She glanced at Maxie, Samuel, Larry, and, surprisingly, Blake.

“These children (this stung Blake) have had something taken from them by this group, something more than physical damage. These three brothers have lost their home, and their friends. And this boy here”, she motioned to Blake,”has lost his father. Maybe we should listen to their voices over others.”

Emil snorted, and said,” Listen to the ideas of children? I would sooner become a fan of John’s.”

From next to Emil, the so far quiet Joseph spoke up, and said,” That’s real nice of you, Emil. You know, maybe the world would be a better place if we didn’t base everything off of age, but experience instead. I’ve seen some kids that contain more wisdom than half of us put together.”

Emil sneered at Joseph, and said,” What did they tell you? That it was a bad idea to kill your mentor?”

Jumping to his feet, Joseph made for Emil like he was going to strangle him. But, Wolf calmly stepped between them, and said,” Ventus has a point. We’ve only seen the horrors of this group. Only those who have lived or been effected by them will give a true outlook on them. And Emil. We have made it very clear that Joseph is innocent, and he had nothing to do with his mentor’s death.”

Emil gave Wolf a sour look, but quieted nonetheless. He didn’t dare cross the champion. Ventus smiled, and turned to the Typhoon Brothers, and said,” Would you please tell us what happened here on the eve of the attack?”

And so the brother’s recounted what had happened, how a group of Gyarados had come from the river, how they had thought they were wild, until realizing they had riders perched on their backs, and how it was too late to pull back, that they had been picked off one by one by Hyper Beams.

Blake listened silently, feeling a new found respect for these three kids. They may have been young, but they acted like adults, and defended their city with pride, and still they refused to give up, though they had been seriously wounded. They were amazing leaders.

Ventus nodded, and said,” I saw the dark aura that these attacks left behind. I believe I can follow it to their base. We can surprise them, and release the prisoners and deal a strong blow against them. We must leave tomorrow. Is this a plan everyone follows?” She peered around the room, and everyone nodded sadly.

Blake hesitated, then stood up, saying,” I would like to go with you, and fight with you. They have dishonored my family, and I must give them back what they dealt to me.”

Ventus gazed into his eyes, which was creepy since she was blind, and said,” You have become far older than your age suggests. You and your friend. I believe they also have your brother?”

Blake nodded. Ventus sighed, and said,” Then I guess we have no choice but for you to accompany us. Now, we shall turn in for the night. We will be leaving early in the morning.”

She got up, and walked out. After a few moments, Wolf also left, then the four Elites. John tapped Blake on the back. Gazing into his eyes, John said,” That’s it then. We’re going to war.”

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Sun Sep 09, 2007 6:47 pm
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If this story was supposed to be rated -10 - 10, i would rate it

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999!
I love this story, and it's way better than the original

story! :shock: :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :shock: you must be really

smart and creative, and :idea: alot when writing your stories! :D

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Tue Dec 11, 2007 7:49 pm
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That many numbers hurt my eyes. You could have just said "This is the best thing I've ever read" and still have expressed your point.
And I don't know if Ghost Writer is still writing this or not. Presumably he may not be...
- DNA

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Tue Dec 11, 2007 8:05 pm
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conewicci wrote:
If this story was supposed to be rated -10 - 10, i would rate it

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999!
I love this story, and it's way better than the original

story! :shock: :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :shock: you must be really

smart and creative, and :idea: alot when writing your stories! :D

Image
ugh. i just had to bleach my eyes ;-;.
That post was horrid. D:


Good story, i think it emits a 7/10. not a 999999E50/10. >->

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Tue Dec 11, 2007 8:09 pm
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:wink: woops! sorry about you having to bleach your eyes out! <(^-^<) lol, but he hasn't posted for a long time though, so maybe he isn't on anymore, or spell checking/writing another chapter/finding one that he already wrote, hope he is not done with psypokes, i love this story!

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Wed Dec 12, 2007 11:54 pm
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