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 Marriage: Something special or a waste of time? 
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Pokemon Master
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Firstly, by no means does this topic intend to offend anyone. All conversation must be kept civilized, 'cos this is a bit touchy topic.
People often say that the day of their marriage was the happiest of their lives. On the other hand, there are people who regret getting married. And recently, things like unmarried couples and the high divorce rate have spoiled the image of wedding. So there's the question: Is marriage really something special or not? And why?

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Sat Jan 19, 2013 6:49 am
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ChillBill wrote:
Firstly, by no means does this topic intend to offend anyone. All conversation must be kept civilized, 'cos this is a bit touchy topic.
People often say that the day of their marriage was the happiest of their lives. On the other hand, there are people who regret getting married. And recently, things like unmarried couples and the high divorce rate have spoiled the image of wedding. So there's the question: Is marriage really something special or not? And why?

For me it's special.
But don't do a incredibly big wedding party and 5 stars restaurant and stuff. It will waste your money.
Just keep it simple, and it will be the best day of your life. ;)
And you must be sure you have the right person.

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Sat Jan 19, 2013 9:46 am
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And be sure you have the right person.

Good luck with that.
Meh, marriage I'm kind of touch and go. I'm fine with the idea, but it just doesn't fit well with me. For instance, I'd rather live the *ahem* college life awhile longer even after I graduate, but the thing is I've been called out and blackened by saying this because they connected the unpopular 'atheist=demon' idea that has hit my hometown with my views of marriage.
I'd rather live my life a little more than my friends' for a reason. When the 10-year reunion comes around, sure, I may say I haven't live my dream out thoroughly, but I have lived more than my friends. Granted, I also don't want to be that one guy who used to be picked on constantly in high school who is now, 10 years later, poor as **** because he lived the 'permanent bachelor' life too much because he has to pay out child support to eight different women. 'That guy' lived to much, and now no one wants him.
But Samurott, haven't you had a gf for about a year and a half now?
Yes, but that doesn't mean I'll be with her forever.

Marriage has a very large impact on one's life, and it's not something to just jump into like it's a **** pool.

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Sat Jan 19, 2013 12:17 pm
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Well, I don't really see the reason behind marriage. I mean, if two people love each other, they can live together without having to make it official at church or the town hall. Rene Goscinny in one of his Lucky Lukes had written this (translation from greek, may differ from original):
Lucky Luke wrote:
Marriage is a wonderful thing that helps two people overcome together the problems they have because they got married.

In other words, I think that the only thing marriage gives you is trouble in case you want a divorce. If you really love someone, you don't need to marry him/her to prove it.

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Sat Jan 19, 2013 2:53 pm
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To me it can't really be a waste of time when a lot of marriages don't really have any time spent on them. People rush way too much. Some on the other hand don't move at all when it comes to relationships. It's sort of a 50/50 problem. So many marriages are rushed. Over 2/3s of marriages end in divorce. :roll: Marriages are shown as a love and respect relationship with the one. Come on! Over 7 Billion people in the world. What's the chances of you meeting the ONE in 7 BILLION? Sure, you might travel and meet someone in Africa that might be the one. What's the chances of that happening? Even if you do travel, a Fifth of the population give or take, can't afford clean, drinking water, let alone a plane trip to Australia or Paris.

With that little rant, it can be something special, but if you know math... It's hard to see it anything other than horrible statistics

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Sat Jan 19, 2013 3:49 pm
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Marriage absolutely can be a waste of time and money.

At least here in the US, anyway - you actually make out better if you are a man who makes 6 figures, and a woman with 3 kids, unemployed, than if you were a happily married couple, with three kids, and the man still only makes 6 figures.



However, it is important to be married - it is horrid to be alone, not have a family structure of some sort. Imagine, being alone, with noone else near you. Imagine being sick, ALONE. Imagine having fallen, and can't get up, with no LifeAlert system, and you're ALONE.

In some localities, by living with someone for a certain number of years automatically forces you to be married, and can attach assets to be awarded upon death.


Sat Jan 19, 2013 9:40 pm
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There is no such thing as 'finding the one'. This only happens in books and films. Sure, sometimes you meet a person who seems like your perfect match, but that's rare. But you can find a lot of people you like. Hook up with one of them.
About the loneliness part... Wouldn't it be better if you just lived as an unmarried couple? You would still have the company of another person and you wouldn't have to pay half the lawyers of the state in case it doesn't work out.
Sorry if I sound like a douche, but a seventeen-year old isn't really good on stable relationships...

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Sun Jan 20, 2013 1:30 am
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I don't believe in big marriages, you don't need to go bridezilla and go all expensive just for one day. I'm been to relatively cheap weddings, and expensive weddings just weren't as wonderful or hype.

I can't say I'm the best at answering, giving a decent opinion or advice when it comes to women because I've been with a couple of people out of a dozen where I thought, heck, maybe this chick could be the one. But here I am now single lol.

Apart from divorces, which back in the days wasn't such a common thing because a marriage between two people was quite the big deal back then. Marriage is pretty meh nowadays, I reckon, here anyway. In the olden days, even if one of them weren't happy, they'd stick it out. Possibly for the kids or the strain of other family members pressuring them, they would try really hard to look passed the faults, if any, and love that person for who they are even if they were mean. Sounds horrible, but some people didn't have a choice back then. Some people just grew out of their love for each other when they got older, it happens.

In saying that, I also think sometimes spending enough time with someone and living with him or her makes you develop more feelings towards them. Sometimes not. I don't know, lots of people are different.

As for the prospective of marriages... I think they're great. Did they finally find the one? Sure, if they both believe and they're happy together, why not? Why overlook the possibility? Have some faith. Do I believe "the one" out there for me and everyone who wants to pursue their "the one"? Sure, definitely. You just gotta think positive. Sometimes, I scoff and laugh at people who, maybe seeing an ex or something, who think they're happy with someone. But you know, who cares. If they're happy, I'm happy for them.

I think plenty of people have lived together, loved each other, yet never got married and lived simply as a couple. That's a valid choice, too.

Anyway, someday, I would like to settle down and eventually do get married. I couldn't get married now or even a after couple of years for now. But when I'm older, maybe close to my thirties, sure.

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Last edited by Crunchy on Thu Jan 24, 2013 2:18 am, edited 1 time in total.



Mon Jan 21, 2013 1:04 am
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Hm... The process of marriage can we a waste of time and resources, sure. I feel that marriage itself, or the idea of marriage, is definitely substantial... for some people. I guess some people just feel that they can go through life without the usage of "symbols": being a Christian without baptism, for example. But to some people, they feel... it's just special, i guess. It's all subjective. I personally like the idea of marriage. It feels like another level, and the idea of being married can be pretty powerful.

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Mon Jan 21, 2013 5:26 pm
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Marriage?
No. Not now, at least. As long as someone has there life set, then go on ahead. For instance, I would like to go to college and get a job doing police work, but if I were to marry out of high school, I would never be able to fulfill that dream.
I guess I should say that I kind of echo Samurott's post, minus the innuedo of him.
Wait until you get your life how you want to be, or at least on the pathway to it, and you should be fine. Then you can think about creating a family.


Tue Jan 22, 2013 11:44 am
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Marrage, regardless of gender, was, is, and always will be very important. What isn't important is wasting a ****load of money on an extravagant wedding. All that matters is that you get to spend time with your friends and family, share the moment.

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Wed Jan 23, 2013 12:43 pm
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I've always seen marriage as a higher step in a relationship. I want the person I marry to be the only one I'm ever married to, so I intend to wait until I'm 100% sure that the person is who I want to spend the rest of my life with. :3

Some people get married before they even live together and that seems ridiculous to me. How can you say that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone when you don't even know how it's going to be to live with them? o.O

I want my wedding to be fun. xD I want people to feel relaxed and enjoy it and I want it to not break my bank account. I fully intend to wear a dress just because I think it would be fun and it would make people laugh. :3

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Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:32 pm
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Marriage to me is something very very special. For me it is a proof of the love and commitment that I have for the person that I love, and I can't think of any better way to show it. As someone with very limited options for marriage. With only eight states in the US offering marriage equality (honestly I don't like saying gay marriage because to me it trivializes the whole thing.) It irritates me that people use marriage for monetary gains, or people toss it off without a second glance. Granted I am nowhere near ready to get married but I would love the options to be easier for me to get to because where I live I would have to go across at least three states no matter how you slice the pie to have a "legal" marriage.

Anywho in short. Marriage is good when you want to show your love to someone.

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Thu Jan 24, 2013 12:39 am
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Divorce is not a bad thing.

A relationship doesn't have to last until one of you dies to be considered successful. Ending a relationship doesn't mean you failed.

There are seriously over a thousand federal benefits for married couples.

There's nothing wrong with getting married solely for financial reasons.

Getting married does not mean that you have to put your life on hold or settle down.


Mon Feb 04, 2013 6:04 pm
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Actually, if you're married, divorce sucks. Even if your only problems are bureaucracy, huge amounts of paperwork and some respectable cash paid to lawyers. And if you have children or other relatives... It's a real pain.
Plus, divorce is against the idea of marriage. It's one of the reasons I don't support it.

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Tue Feb 05, 2013 8:15 am
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Divorce sucks big time. Take it from a child of a divorced family it is not fun for anyone. You make a promise to stick around till death do you part, and you just give up when times get ****. I hate it its been possibly the worst, but on the other hand, and the best thing in my life.

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Tue Feb 05, 2013 5:02 pm
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I have some friends that are (were) married. I have friends who are now single parents, and other friends who pay out the ass for child support and can't support themselves. My best friend is my age and has 2 kids, ages four and five. When she got knocked up with the first one she kept telling me how awesome her wedding was going to be, she even wanted me to be a bridesmaid (yeah right.) She had like everything planned out, she didn't care how much it costed. After she popped him and immediately got knocked up with the second one like a month later she postponed "the wedding" until 2010, she even had a date set in September. September 2010 came and went, and she had gained like 120lbs so she kept using that as an excuse that she didn't want the wedding yet, it was now postponed until 2011. I know she really loved him and she'd cry to me when things weren't going well, which was like, all the time.

Things happened, he **** around on her and she **** around on him. There was never any official wedding even though they were legally married sometime in 2009. They're now separated, she lives in the $120,000 house they bought while he lives with his parents, still paying all the bills and supporting his family. He's severely going to get **** over, all because he married her. sux2bhim

Anyway, you don't need a piece of paper to tell someone you love them. There is no such thing as "forever," call me wrong on this if you'd like, you'll find out for yourself. Never go into a relationship thinking its going to last forever, or you'll have your heart torn out.

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Mon Feb 18, 2013 9:38 am
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I was told two things about marraige:

1) Dont marry young

2) Never say never

As for my personal thought on marriage, if you dive headfirst into it, not thought, live in the moment, Sorry, its gonna come back and bite you in the bite. I think you should take your time with it. Take your time wait a year or two before you pop the question. And for crying out loud, it doesnt need to be such a big expensive deal. Skip all the yapping and get to the important part, the "I do's". Seriously.

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Mon Feb 18, 2013 10:34 am
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Marriage is symbolic of love. Marriage doesn't define love. Love doesn't require marriage.


Sat Mar 09, 2013 10:03 pm
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ChillBill wrote:

People often say that the day of their marriage was the happiest of their lives.


So long as you don't let your Mother-in-law plan it.....


I've been married for 3 1/2 years now. Neither of us regret it. <3

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Sun Mar 10, 2013 5:15 am
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It'll be a special memory to me, I'm sure. I've always imagined my wedding day and I personally can't wait! I've got a dress in mind, a place, color scheme, etc. all picked out...just missing the guy to marry lol

I don't think it's necessary though, if you're in love and happy, a wedding won't change that. Just a choice you and your partner have to make :)


Thu Mar 14, 2013 8:35 pm
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Oh man, this topic. Marriage itself is ok but I am highly against it mostly cause of the concept of a wedding & to an extent the concept of a divorce.

Divorce feels like a sham due to the legal stuff that takes place when one happens such as losing stuff, money & as others have mentioned, having to pay lawyers at all, you basically have to pay to move on from a relationship which I find painfully unfair in most cases as a so called "sacred union" shouldn't be based on or cost a single cent to establish or end.

In regards to the idea of a Wedding, I find it among the worse parts of the process of becoming married. It is often expensive, drilled into our children as this initiator of the "sacred union" that marriage is supposedly suppose to be & last but not least is seen as something you are forced to go through just to be in a relationship with the one you love at some point cause that is what is expected of all couples to do in society.

Marriage itself has it's bad points too but it isn't a bad thing to be married or it wouldn't be if the structure of it was different. Lastly, for me myself, I can't possibly consider getting married even if I found the person I would most want to if forced to. Why, because as far as I am concerned I find marriage a burden that under some circumstances prevents one from eventually finding their "true love" as they can't even experiment passed dating with possible candidates due to the possibility of marriage holding it up & sometimes permanently putting a cap on what may have in the future been "true love". I am a committed person & will be to a woman I find I will love more then any other but I also feel that marriage should not be necessary just to prove that, especially not in society. Sorry about the long passage but I have a very strong hatred for marriage from some point of views...

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Mon Apr 15, 2013 11:35 am
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I feel like marriage is a great thing if you wanna marry your best friend, but if you want to marry some bimbo who probably has a nice rack and a clean vag, marriage is probably not for you. I wanna marry someone who knows me as a person and loves me and wants to make love to me, but at the same time we can just sit and play pokemon together and minecraft. And have geek children and take them to comic con as a family and it would be awesome.


Mon May 06, 2013 7:53 am
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I once dated a girl for a little over five years. We started seeing each other in middle school, dated all throughout high school, and stayed together a little while after graduation, before breaking up in a civil manner (no name-calling or throwing of things). It was mostly because we were headed different directions. Five months later, I heard that she's engaged. So I guess it just depends on who you find. I have recently started dating a friend, who I've known for eight years, and things are going great. I think marrying someone you've known for a long time (i.e. longer than two weeks or five months) is essential if you want a happy and healthy relationship. As Ron White put it, "She knows what I like and I know what she won't do."

AllyKatt wrote:
I feel like marriage is a great thing if you wanna marry your best friend, but if you want to marry some bimbo who probably has a nice rack and a clean vag, marriage is probably not for you.

Eloquently put, I love it!

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Mon May 06, 2013 8:28 am
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Me and my wife have been married since September. We couldn't be happier. We don't really act like were married though, its just as if we are living together. And that to us is really special. {charizard} and {rapidash} (Our favourite pokemon)

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