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 rubbish jokes 
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wanna hear a bad joke?
an idiot goes to a music store and buys a stereo,but he returns it,WHY??? because both speakers let out the same song :| :) :D :lol: :lol: :) :( :oops: sorry.
post your own jokes and let us cry.

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Sat Nov 24, 2007 6:49 am
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What do you call a male teacher? Teachim!

Read and vomit.

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Sat Nov 24, 2007 2:30 pm
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Okay, like I didn't find these in a joke book, but my friend was making up TERRIBLE jokes to make us explode. Here are some.

" A man and a dove are sitting by the street. The man asks 'Do you like being a dove?'. The bird says 'I dove it!' "

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha...haaa...uhh...yeah, that one sucks.

" A man walks into a restaurant and orders a lion. He gets one and it says 'I'm a dog!'. 'No you aren't' the man says. But the lion says 'I'm a lyin' lion!' "

Ooomph...BLECCKKKK! :mad:

Ugh...there were more, but I don't want to kill you with the rest of that :censored:.

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Sat Nov 24, 2007 4:15 pm
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Here is a junky joke my dad just told me today.....

Why doesn't Michigan sink in the Great Lakes?

Because Ohio sucks.


That joke killed me, and not in the good sence of the word.

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Sat Nov 24, 2007 4:25 pm
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What does the 300 pound canary say? Cheep. Hahaha.

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Wait, the guy who made this topic plays runescape? So 3rd grade.

From my "Stupid Insults" thread, where people tell eachother how people insulted them in a hilariously stupid manner, how ironic!


Sat Nov 24, 2007 4:25 pm
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Here is one my friend's little brother told me.



Why did the chicken cross the road?


Because, the hobo smelled bad.



He has been obsessed with hobos recently. :|

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Sat Nov 24, 2007 5:47 pm
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Groudon King wrote:
Here is a junky joke my dad just told me today.....

Why doesn't Michigan sink in the Great Lakes?

Because Ohio sucks.


That joke killed me, and not in the good sence of the word.


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Sun Nov 25, 2007 2:45 am
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got another one:so thier is a court and the judge is a dispicable general who will kill you for burning his toast.anyway somebody sneezes and the judge demands who sneezed,no one answers so he shoots 6 people,then he asked who sneezed,no one answered so he shot another 6,he asked for the last time who sneezed,someone replied:i sneezed.and do you know what the judge did to him?he said:bless you. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :oops:

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Sun Nov 25, 2007 3:44 am
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Lol. What does toast have to do with it?

You know, I don't get the "Why did the ... cross the road?"
Really, the one I don't understand is "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
The only answer could be "To get to the other side", couldn't it? Unless it was like, running away from someone trying to cut it up for K.F.C. food or something.

Most jokes are bad. I hate it when a terrible event occurs and unthoughtful people start making jokes about it. The "Knock Knock" jokes are usually rubbish too.
I like some "blondes jokes" though, (probably because I'm not blonde).

Erm, what do you call a blonde with brains? A Labrador.

...Sorry.

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Fri Dec 28, 2007 7:02 pm
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Did someone said "blonde jokes"?

The government of USA had found a lie-checker machine. The government decided to test this machine on 3 women: one blonde, one bald and one black.

The first turn was the bald one's. The professors made her sit on a chair and made her wear a weird cap connected to a gigantic machine.

"I think that..." she said. "I think that I am the most beautiful woman in the world."

The machine bleeped. The professors nodded.

It was the black's turn now. "I think that..." she said, "I think that I am the strongest woman in the world."

The machine bleeped again.

Now it was the blonde's turn. "I think that..." she said as the machine bleeped.

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Sat Dec 29, 2007 2:59 am
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Why did the number of hurricanes in the world decrease?
Because every other one was a himmicane
Sux, i know.


"Hey (insert name here), why did the chicken cross the road?"
"Chicken? What chicken?"

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Sat Dec 29, 2007 1:14 pm
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i got 1...

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started.'

Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'

The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, 'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.'

He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then' he said with a deep sigh, …

'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'

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Sat Nov 08, 2008 4:37 pm
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how do you get a bunch of babies in a car?
blender.

how do you get them out?
taco.

okay, that is disgusting, but i couldn't help but giggle when i first heard it.

-

how do you catch a unique rabbit?
unique up on it.

how do you catch a tame rabbit?
tame thing.

-

tarzan sees the elephants coming over the hill and says, 'here come the elephants, over the hill.'

what is the difference between an elephant and a grape?
elephants are gray, grapes are purple.

jane is colorblind. she sees the elephants and says, 'here come the grapes, over the hill.'

-

why did the turtle cross the road?
it was stapled to the chicken.

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Sat Nov 08, 2008 4:51 pm
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How many electricians does it take to fit a lightbulb?
One.

There's two cows in a field. Suddenly, a rabbit jumps out from a bush! One cow looks at it, then eats some more grass.

There's a priest and a rabbi on a plane. The flight is short, and they do not talk.

What's the difference between a bulldog and a poodle?
There are many. They are two totally different breeds of dog.

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse?
A muel.

There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman and they are all
trapped in a jail cell.
Eventually they all starved to death .

Doctor, I've broken my leg .
I'm afraid it is a very bad break. You will never walk again.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Some poems rhyme
But this one doesn't.

Why are there no aspirin in the jungle?
Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell
pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated areas such as rainforests.

Why do undertakers wear ties?
Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their
appearance has a degree of gravitas

What do you call a cat with no tail?
A manx cat.

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge?
She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly
low self-esteem .


A man walks into a bar.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.


Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The police I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband is dead.

Roooooooofl ;D

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Sun Nov 09, 2008 1:41 pm
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A guy walks into a bar and says "ow".

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Sun Nov 09, 2008 5:29 pm
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two guys are kidnapped by cannibals. as they're sitting, tied up in the pot of water and veggies, waiting to be boiled to death, one of them bursts out laughing.
"Hahahahaha!!!11!!"
"What's up? how can yuo be laughing at a time like this?!?" the other one asks.
"I just peed in their soup!"

hahaha...

A woman walks into a doctor's office.
She says, "Doc! you've gotta help me out!"
The doctor answers, "Well, go back the way you came..."

:p

A blonde goes to by a chainsaw.
She talks to the guy at the help desk. "I want a chainsaw that'll cut down 5 trees in an hour!"
The receptionist picks out a chainsaw and gives it to her.
The next day, the blonde comes back with the chainsaw.
"I tried for 4 hours, and I couldn't even cut down a little tree with it! what's wrong with it?"
The receptionist picks it up, pulls the starter, the engine revs up and the blonde asks: "What's that noise?"

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre. so the bartender gives her one.

jokes are soooo bad... yet sooo funny.

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Sun Nov 09, 2008 8:59 pm
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very bad harry potter knock knock jokes that I wrote myself :) :


knock knock
who's there?
harry
harry who?
harry up an' oped the door
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

knock knock
who's there?
dumbledore
dumbledore who
shut up and open this dumbledore(dumb ol' door)
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

knock knock
who's there?
ron
ron who?
ron weasly
:? :? :? :?


knock knock
who's there?
hermione
hermione who?
hermione good at telling knock knock jokes?(hermione:am I any. geddit)
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I spend all day thinking of more, and I'll post them later :lol: :lol: :lol:


Sun Nov 09, 2008 10:27 pm
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A physics professor and his assistant are working on a liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ion when the assistant says, "Wait, Professor. What if the salicylic acids don't accept the hydroxil ion?" To which the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion! That's my wife!"

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Sun Nov 09, 2008 10:46 pm
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Sneaky Sneasel wrote:
A physics professor and his assistant are working on a liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ion when the assistant says, "Wait, Professor. What if the salicylic acids don't accept the hydroxil ion?" To which the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion! That's my wife!"


I rode the roflcopter.

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(S)ome dumb kids looked at Mewtwo and thought "Hey he can clone things and move objects with his mind and be weak to Ghost attacks, why can't I?" Because it is a freaking game!!! Not something you should actaully practice in real life!!!


Mon Nov 10, 2008 5:30 am
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Sneaky Sneasel wrote:
A physics professor and his assistant are working on a liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ion when the assistant says, "Wait, Professor. What if the salicylic acids don't accept the hydroxil ion?" To which the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion! That's my wife!"


I think I've heard that one before. Was it from dexter's lab? (Wow what a memory I have.. I remember this, but don't have any idea of what I did yesterday)

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Mon Nov 10, 2008 8:46 am
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what do you call a statement that isnt exactly true?
a lie.
:lol:


arty farty had a party and everyone was there.
tootie fruitie made a doodie and everyone wet out for air :lol:


say this very slowly....
I am wee todd did

it took my sister 20 times to get this one. :lol:


what do you call a dumb person?
a blonde.

what do you call a smart blonde?
a genious.

i know... pathetic. :|

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Sat Nov 15, 2008 4:23 pm
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Double posting is bad, but quadruple posting? Come on, you should know better than that...

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Sat Nov 15, 2008 5:12 pm
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Ok, there are 3 girls; a burnette, a redhead, and a blond. The three girls decide to have a challenge and see who can swim across the English channel the fastest, only using the breast stroke. After a few hours the burnette and the redhead finally make it across at about the same time. They wait around for while, waiting for the blond to finish. By the end of the day, she finally makes it. The redhead asks what took her so long, and she replies: "You guys said we had to do the breast stroke, and I saw you using your arms."

Ok, here's an absolutely horrid joke:
Two drumsticks and a cymbal fall off of a cliff. (sound commonly heard after a joke is made.) You know, the "pu-dun-ching" sound. Awful, I know.

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Sat Nov 15, 2008 5:34 pm
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:| wow that is bad, both of them

what does a tree say when a hurricane's winds blew the tree off it's stump..........

answer: oh, snap :lol:

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Last edited by drakonezduskmoon on Sat Jan 10, 2009 9:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.



Wed Nov 19, 2008 2:22 pm
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lol, I love jokes like that. ^.^

What do the French do with their bikes after the Tour de France?

They re-cycle them!


Al Qaeda has put bombs into tins of alphabet soup. If they go off, it could spell disaster.

My dad told me that. =)

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